Me too… I get reminded to the times when my Granma had hens… They aren’t smart but very funny, fluffy and they lay eggs! What not to like? 
Okay, I had nothing of the work except cleaning them when we cooked some… Dissecting animals is interesting, I saw things people who just buy chicken in the supermarket don’t.
Hi folks, I still can’t stay away for long…
Alvaro is the cook again, it’s pretty good now, he makes tomato soup for himself and fries chicken liver in the oven (using coconut oil as it’s a food for us two, he hates lard except for lean pork and we run out of that long ago anyway and couldn’t buy it since… I have tallow but he extremely hates it, I rather not use that even for myself or very carefully as the smell bothers him and it’s not my fav either, the tallow itself, I mean, not just the smell. the little birds will like it in winter. but I don’t find coconut oil a problem enough to make our food separately. I just don’t use it for my own food)… Poor chickens but I love liver and still can’t get proper meat…
My hunger is worse than ever, I mean, the complete lack of it… It’s usually negative, even. I wonder when I will able even taking a bite, my appetite is VERY negative too and it has total control. I don’t need appetite to eat but if it’s negative, I won’t eat, no matter what (it’s very annoying when I have negative appetite with strong hunger but I so can’t stand hunger that it raises my appetite to zero soon so I can eat).
Oh, we will see. I refuse to worry about undereating (last time I was worried and thought about it a lot and that’s horrible and unnecessary. and it didn’t raise my calories at all), I never ever did that for more than a few days, my body realizes what happens and give me proper signs again.
But if it wouldn’t, well, I track and notice things (but eating very little is probably apparent without tracking too. I am super bad at it though) so I will just change my food choices sometimes. It should help. So many things to experiment on! I never had my occasional high-calorie days on carni but I need it for longer carni times. I will need planning. And probably 2 meals. My very extensive overeating experiences should help, I still have some trick even though I lost my number 1 item to eat a ton (even after satiation), carbs. I have more.
But it actually should be natural… Oh well. I just need a high-calorie day now and then. My normal days surely will be okay eventually when my body gets over its confusion. My carni food is very satiating especially meat. It probably never will change but getting very satiated with a few bites is something I never want again. That’s one reason why I do OMAD now: it’s best to wait until proper hunger so I probably can eat a big enough meal. It’s a double-edged sword as longer fasts often cause smaller meals but my body will learn and it always was very serious about its calories and tricking it is hard. It just gets confused for some days sometimes when I change something. I have fat reserves so that’s fine. And fasting often feels so damn good… And then desire and need for food emerges again. I am not too extreme.
I don’t know what is head hunger… Probably some mental thing?
I have stomach hunger and “real” hunger, need for fuel (maybe the last two are close), appetite and compulsion (and I miss eating when I don’t eat for a longer time than usual even if I am too satiated to eat. it’s a mental thing just like compulsion but it’s not that as I don’t feel a desire to eat, often the opposite, I just miss eating if it makes sense). I almost always ate immediately as any urge emerged in the past, now I try to wait for a real need. Taking a bite without it could trigger a big meal with carbs but it doesn’t work now. I only can eat a proper meal if I really feel the need and ability.
Oh, sorry. Lighter topic then. Coffee. I - not surprisingly - went back to my thinking that coffee is my mostly harmless liquid and it doesn’t make any sense not to have it when I feel it helps. I need it most when I am too satiated, of course I won’t eat then! But that’s off carni so doesn’t matter here.
On carni days, I don’t drink coffee now. If possible. We will see. I have a few reasons to drink coffee as medicine but hopefully they won’t happen often on my carni days. The biggest reason (carb poisoning) surely won’t And it’s too ineffective for headaches so I will just suffer, I guess as if I won’t drink coffee, I surely won’t take a pill, I avoid them anyway as much as I can and they are expensive… No, I won’t suffer, I am a hedonist with a very low pain tolerance. I won’t get headaches then or solve them differently.
I drink tea but I need something warm 
And for some reason, I drink extremely much water. At some point I worried that not drinking coffee will plummet my calories as I always will be full with water and with my reduced urges to eat, it matters. Without coffee, I drink lots of water all the time, even in the first half of the day. My thirst is annoying sometimes, it always was extremely strong but at least I have zero problems against plain water. I had times when I found getting most of my water intake using plain water a bit boring. A thirsty person totally appreciates good water and I have good one. I drank better tap water in my life but it’s superior to most tap waters in the country, I am sure. I have some experience. My childhood place had very bad water, I couldn’t drink it without an unusually strong thirst. Maybe that’s why I want to drink is differently so often. Well, not anymore. Water is good. I still like some variety now and then but it’s not nearly as important as before. Winter probably will raise my desire to have something warm… And I still can’t make soups without vegetables, I almost never even have proper bony animal parts! 
Well, spiced egg milk is an option… I need my soups, I miss them when 5 days pass without eating any. But it’s hard when I don’t have meat for them and don’t want vegetables… I just need flavor and water. And poached eggs, usually.
OxtoberFest Sounds good. I need to rethink my chances. I thought it’s impossible with all the grapes and apples but my body serious hates the idea of grapes and apples now.
But I still can’t get meat from the farm And it’s my only proper source.
, in fact it is a natural thing actually 
but in the end this tired will drop and energy levels will spike and your change will come!