Keto Complaint Department


(8 year Ketogenic Veteran) #1256

I need less sleep. I wake up feeling rested and energized at least two hours earlier.
I am getting more valuable tasks accomplished because I have more time.
DAMN YOU KETO


(Blessed with butter ) #1257

Cutest garbage disposal I have ever seen


#1258

Reminds me of the joke:

A priest was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners who he knew as being an unkempt housekeeper. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life. “Were these dishes ever washed?” he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime. She replied, “They’re as clean as soap and water could get them”. He felt a bit apprehensive but blessed the food anyway and started eating. It was really delicious and he said so, despite the dirty dishes. When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and barked “Here Soap! Here Water!”


(Sandi Smith) #1259

I had to buy a suitcase while I was in Europe this summer because all of the clothes I brought from home were falling off of me or hanging down. I just knew the ones at home would be even worse. What else could I do? I needed to replace my whole wardrobe with beautiful European outfits. Sigh…I really miss those baggy clothes. (Said no one…ever!)

Oh yeah…and my 2 favorite pairs of dress shoes are somehow too large now. Seriously-- has anyone else experienced this? I didn’t have swollen feet before so I don’t get it. ahhhhh such trauma!


(Drew Says "Eat the Salt, you damned stinking Keto ape" Hardcore Label Licka ) #1260

I have the same problem so I workout to this while laughing like a madman at 4am
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4SA-EelmFLo


(Drew Says "Eat the Salt, you damned stinking Keto ape" Hardcore Label Licka ) #1261

Yes home made pate on home made mozzarella drop cracker as per 2K Dudes podcast


(Eric - The patient needs to be patient!) #1262

I had the same problem. IF 18/6 and OMAD fasting has improved that. Also, I am able to eat to satiety at least the day after a fast. It took me a while to calm my appetite.


(Bacon is a many-splendoured thing) #1263

I do too, and my keto complaint these days is that I feel so full most of the time that I don’t have room even for leftovers, much less bacon! What are you doing to me, keto???


(Keto Travels) #1264

No room for bacon? That’s not a good vision of my future… :worried::worried::worried:


(Running from stupidity) #1265

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(Jane) #1266

:rofl:

I ALWAYS eat my bacon first since I am usually full before I finish what is on my plate. Better to shove 1/3 of an omelet over to my husband to finish than BACON!


(Dan Dan) #1267

I was once told that you are what you eat and then I just cried and cried and cried cause no matter how much I wanted to be one I just couldn’t bring myself to eating a skinny person. :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:


(Krista) #1268

I’ve had this happen! The ankle boots that I would fight with to get zipped up, I can now comfortably fit 2 fingers between my ankle and the boot with some extra wiggle room. Now when i wear them I’m in constant fear of them flying off and hitting someone in the head. :rofl:


(Keto Travels) #1269

Well, it’s official, keto is making me sew! No point in buying new work clothes in the middle of losing. Today had to adjust the bands of the boring work bras (you know the ones that make it look like you have no [spoiler]nipples[/spoiler] in case there are any Americans around - sorry for the generalization if you are the kind of American who can cope with natural anatomy!!!). Cause they were floppy under the arms and I refuse to buy new ones that are equally boring. I’d rather spend money on bacon! Always hated sewing, can’t do a straight seam, and my fingertips are bloody now - thanks keto!!


(Running from stupidity) #1270

:grin::grin::grin::grin::grin::grin:


(Alex ) #1271

tidied my bedroom the other day, like top to bottom, and even vacuumed the cobwebs out the corner of the room and then wiped the skirting board with a dettol spray and did about 2 years worth of paper shredding!

this never happens. Some days, I genuinely feel like I’m on ketosis amphetamines.

images


(bulkbiker) #1272

Watch out for that… Keto made me join a gym… well for 3 months then I stopped going… unfortunately took 18 months to decide to stop paying for it!


#1273

I still get those, erythritol takes care of that. Except, it’s not a wee I want any more :fearful:


#1274

Oh, it’s not that. We just like promoting our products whenever we can.

barbie

#CapitalismAtWork


(Keto Travels) #1275

Now that finally explains that anatomical incorrectness mystery … Barbies were invented by the descendants of the puritans! :joy: