Tell you what, though, if you’re 15 to 30 and not texting while you drive, you’re a rare individual…
Humor :-)
ctviggen
(Bob M)
#524
My kids loved helping me get my number of steps by taking my watch and rapidly swinging their arms back and forth. I ceased using it after that.
And I think exercise is next to useless for weight loss (though there may be other benefits to it).
anon2571578
#526
Ours pretty much ended in 2004. And Gen Zers I talk to are prettty much convinced that they’ll either all die in a school shooting or that there will be no jobs for them at all. Bold of you to assume any of us have dreams.
Aqua_chonk
(Stickin' with mammoth)
#534
BMI = Belly Melting Index
Or how much pudge flows out around you when at rest.
Warning: When you lose weight, all round things initially go slack and DO NOT automatically assume factory settings like spring-loaded window blinds.
Summary: Bras are expensive.
PaulL
(You've tried everything else; why not try bacon?)
#535
And the cat will wriggle out of them, lol!
OldDoug
(Doug)
#536
A woman walked into a bar with a chunk of asphalt under her arm. “A beer for me, and one for the road.”
A man, entering a bar, walked into a screen door. Really strained himself.
A dyslexic man walked into a bra.
PaulL
(You've tried everything else; why not try bacon?)
#537
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar, and the bartender says, “What is this, some kind of joke?”
VirginiaEdie
(Edith)
#540
I have a similar joke:
Did you hear the one about a guy who walked into a bar?
He said, “Ouch!”
Ruina
(Hyperbole- best thing in the universe!)
#541
A skeleton walks into a bar. “I’ll have a beer and a mop.”
OldDoug
(Doug)
#542
A man walks into a bar and orders three beers.
The bartender brings him the three beers, and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third, until they’re gone.
He then orders three more and the bartender says, “Sir, I know you like them cold, so you can start with one, and I’ll bring you a fresh one as soon as you’re low.”
The man says, “You don’t understand. I have two brothers, one in Australia and one in Ireland. We made a vow to each other that every Saturday night, we’d still drink together. So right now, my brothers have three beers, too, and we’re drinking together.”
The bartender thinks it’s a wonderful tradition, and every week he sets up the guy’s three beers. Then one week, the man comes in and orders only two. He drinks them and then orders two more. The bartender says sadly, “Knowing your tradition, I’d just like to just say that I’m sorry you’ve lost a brother.”
The man replies, “Oh, my brothers are fine – I just quit drinking.”