Found this in a Facebook low carb group.
If anyone knows how to post the Whole list here please do.
I have lost a 2 month old horse and still need to lose the small bale of hay.
Edit: Thanks to birddog27 for posting the list below…
I’ve lost an Irish Setter and still need to lose the average amount of refined Sugar an American eats in a year…
I’ve lost about a human leg. Magically I’m still bipedal. I hope to lose the 2yr old horse by the end of the calendar year!
However, I did even know I owned a horse till this list came out… Each entry would be even better with a:
I’ve lost a … and I’ve gained cheats on my life.
Or
… I’ll get to see my great grand children
… I’ll get to see flying cars
I’ve lost a sperm whale’s brain. Awesome!
Now all l have to do is lose that dammed housecat.
No offence @mikki.
Got news for you, saw experimental flying cars on TV the other day…
So you might can consider that a win. And if your kids and grandchildren are having babies high achievers… well I am 64 and have two great grandchildren so I guess I have to shoot for great great grandchildren. 
I thought I’d seen the odd housecat feature in your posts. It’s understandable if a person might have felt a certain sensitivity…
i like being thought of even if it isn’t me 
it’s the spirit and thought that counts right?
Oh no - I’ve apparently lost a 2 year old… who has my rack of ribs!
