Keto Complaint Department

[MaryAnn]

The flies!! I miss those pals.

[Kyz]

Dear Keto,

What the heck did you do with my snoring? My possible sleep apnea? I miss waking myself up and getting teased by my children on those rare occasions we slept in the same room!

Sincerely,
Silent Sleeper

[Brenda]

I love you guys!
You are coming up with some hilarious (but factual) complaints!

[Brenda]

KETO REMOVED MY PACK RAT TENDENCIES!!!

One of the cool things that happens to me when I fast is that I get an extra burst of energy and mental clarity. I use this to organize my house and my paperwork. It’s been working out really well. I almost have my entire house gone through. And I’m a bit of a pack rat.
Not anymore.
Keto and fasting took away my pack rat super powers!!!
Interested in enhancing your ketogenic super powers?
Join us.

June 2017 Zornfast

Yep. There’s gonna be one. Starting June 22. I’m fasting until Sunday June 25. A water fast. This month’s group fast. June 22nd to June 25th I started practicing monthly fasts last February of 2016. I still gain great benefit. Zornfasts are normally the third week of each month. Join if you’d like, we’ll support each other here. I always do a water fast. (water/ black coffee & tea). The definition of a fast is open to your interpretation and needs. Some will need to do a fat fast. There ar…

[Mr.A46221]

I can do a full turn in the standard size bathroom stall without rocking the door or walls. Silly mobility.

[Dustin_Bowen]

I hate having to sew the fat man extender in my waistband shut so my pants fit for another week. Damn losing all those inches from my belly and waist. I mean who wants to buy new clothes? Really?

[Mike_Keathley]

Last night, I had so much energy that I felt compelled to clean my kitchen, clean my bathroom, and clean out my entire pantry! I didn’t get to bed until midnight!

I am thinking I will have to stop taking Concerta because my concentration has gotten insane!

[keehan]

I predict stock in back scratchers will dive as people rediscover they can reach back and give themselves a good scratch without the help of a back scratcher.

[Dustin_Bowen]

Have you tried the Jalapeño bacon yet?

[KetogenicJoseph]

I miss enjoying a nice morning poop everyday first thing in the morning. Now I poop like once every 3 days.

[Siddy]

I have discovered that Keto has cleared my brain-fog. If anyone of you should stumble upon it, pleas ignore it… it will only confuse you and make you loos your vocabulary.

[Brenda]

Nope. I’d love it tho

[Dave_Cadoff]

Phew!!! I thought it was just me.

[JustPeachy]

Ok, these crazy voices in my head has to Stop! It’s driving me nuts!!! Stuff like…you can clean out the cupboards, clean out this fridge, you should clean out the pantry…you should clean out this garage (at 5:30am no less)! Seriously, WTH! Make It Stop!!!

[Siddy]

Another keto aggravation… I no longer can walk among the deadly un-noticed. Cute comments even from cashiers at the grocery store. How am I going to hide my awesomeness now?? Bloody keto!!!

[JustPeachy]

Oh great! Now, the driest white wine I can find tastes sweet! Geee, thanks Keto!

[KBDelight]

I no longer feel post lunch sleepiness that has plagued me over the years. Now I’m getting work done at work (go figure) instead of looking for a place that I could catch a quick nap and not have anyone notice! (never succeeded)

Inspired me to start a website as well. Something in which I never thought I would ever do in my life. But something about how I feel on Keto, the support and motivation I get from people in this group and the funny looks I get from people when I add fat to things or remove the bread from a sammich.

Here’s my work in progress if anyone has any tips, suggestions, (praise?), critique, etc I would really appreciate it!
https://kbketo.com/

For awhile - I really missed pizza - but then I made a fathead pizza… nom nom nom and I’m set. (the only downside is I want to eat the whole thing despite how full it can make you - eat slower eat slower eat slower).

Plus I dont really miss Beer because I can make some awesome keto drinks when I have company over or I have some go to’s when I am out.

[Brenda]

I just shared your dinosaur egg recipe

[KBDelight]

I just shared your dinosaur egg recipe

Thank you so very much!

[Jennifer_Monaghan]

I like it! I find most recipe sites long-winded. You have to scroll thru pages of antidote about how they came up with the recipe and how fun it is blah blah just to find the actual recipe. Your intros are short and to the point.

I am going to make some dino eggs!

“Contrary to popular belief, building a dino egg is an art, not a science.”