i tried the following process practically by accident and if you find cocoa calms you, it’s perfect, alongside scrambled eggs fried in burnt tallow, for trying to keep oneself calm while having interpersonal problems over the internet.
but yeah process for overcooked maple hot chocolate:
1 serving imitation maple extract
1 serving imitation vanilla extract
water to taste
place in pan and on stove
boil until you get bored of boiling maple vanilla water
add as much cocoa as the water warrants
stir, boil, simmer, boil, simmer, do whatever you want heat wise
add as much whipping cream as you want (0 is acceptable but I have no idea who drinks their cocoa fat-free, and if you don’t add cream the next simmer can and should be skipped)
simmer until you get bored of simmering unsweetened hot chocolate. 20+ minutes recommended
decant into a mug that has carl franklin’s mug on it (this is not required; I decant into a plain red mug because I don’t have a carl mug). sweeten to taste with whatever sweetener you want (… just don’t do sugar. please).
I’m currently in a hypercortisolic state so if I’m not mistaken this did raise my blood sugar significantly.