I still feel fat

#1

Anyone else experience this? I’ve been doing keto for weight loss since 10/2017, almost exactly 6 months to the day. I’ve lost 19% (50 lbs) of my body weight, to be at goal I need to lose another 6%, so I’m close, pretty damn close. But I still feel fat, honestly, as fat as I felt when I started this journey.

There are so many factors that tell me otherwise including the scale, measurements, having to buy new clothes, old clothes that I’d given-up ever fitting in again are fitting me, new belts, complements from friends/family/co-workers etc. But I still feel like that other version of me.

We have MANY mirrors in our home, in our master bath we have a 9/10 foot mirror that runs the length of our sinks/bathroom counter. It’s impossible to avoid it but I do, just like I used to it’s crazy, I don’t look into it unless I’m flossing or brushing my teeth and even then when brushing I walk away from the mirror.

Anyone experienced anything like this? What the hell is wrong with me, I should be celebrating not only the weight loss but how great I feel on keto.

Thanks in advance!

(Banting & Yudkin & Atkins & Eadeses & Cordain & Taubes & Volek & Naiman & Bikman ) #2

I’m not as far as you, being only about 4 months now, and only 13% of body weight, but Iget what you’re saying and feeling.

That said, I like to have pictures of back when I was at my full size, and keep some of the old clothes around (I haven’t actually bought new ones, I’m just cycling down through my closet) to keep an eye on how far I’ve come.

I view this as an aspect of negative self talk, and so it helps to have visual reminders of progress.

I have my badge picture for work that I can hold up to the mirror and see the changes in my face. It’s kind of important to have those before pictures and things.

(Liz ) #3

Oh yes, the brain takes WAY longer to catch up with the physical changes, I have found. I still suck in my gut to squeeze through spaces that are plenty big for me now lol.

I can’t really see myself so well in mirrors so I end up taking full length selfies using my phone’s timer and then I study the photos and see if I can get my brain to map my new shape/size. It takes time.

(Danielle) #4

Take a photo of yourself right now. Full length. Then look at a photo of yourself 6 months ago. You will be amazed. But photos are much more “transparent” than the mirror.

I’m currently looking back on photos from a year ago (my lowest weight 155#) and I’m in AWE of myself. I looked amazing. I KNOW that I didn’t feel like I looked amazing at the time. I still felt fat. I’m currently 6 months preggo and have gained about 35#. Although I will say, I do not look preggo in my face. Keto has helped a lot with controlling bloat/swelling. But I know that I will find that again. You’ve come very far, but yeah, it is hard to feel the changes in your mind.

(Vladaar Malane) #5

Definitely, it’s tough to be happy with yourself looking in the mirror, when you see models on tv and pictures all the time.

People say I look great right now, but I’m like no, no, no. I got 20 pounds of fat yet that goes around my waist and back.

But yes, I am proud of what I’ve accomplished so far, and how far I’ve come. It’s the learning to have patience and keto on that is tough. I’m not making huge gains in loss of weight anymore. So it’s harder to feel like I’m doing something. But one thing for sure. While I might not be losing anymore I definitely am not gaining the weight back. Thank God.

So with all that said, as they say Keep Calm and Keto On. Eventually, you’ll get that result you want.

(Allie) #6

When you look on the mirror, look hard at yourself until you see something you like about yourself - not weight related and doesn’t have to be body related, it can be aspects of your personality - just anything positive like your eyes, your skin, the shape of your nose, whatever, doesn’t matter what as this is just for you. Hold on to that positive and keep acknowledging it. Next day, go through it again but find another positive to add to the one you have from the previous day, and carry on like this, day after day. Keep acknowledging the things you like about yourself and your body, keep reminding yourself of all the good things. It’s a process in which you need to learn to like and appreciate yourself for who you are, including any perceived flaws as they are what make you the individual you are. In time, with persistence and regular practice, you’ll be able to see the positives much more brightly than anything you see as a negative now, and those perceived negatives will lose their power over you (you may even learn to appreciate them in their own individual way!) :heart:

(Hannah Grace) #7

I know their will be a lot of good answers for this but one thing I will say is that I’ve been in the same place. I lost 70-75 lbs. of weight and still felt as self-conscious and just plain “fat” as I had to begin with. I was at a normal weight but my body just didn’t fit what I thought it would look like when I dropped that much weight.
On another hand, I’ve actually gained about 25-30 lbs. back because of a lot of stress and too much laxness on my diet (yo-yo dieting + stress+ carb overload = weight gain for me). Now when I look back I’m sad that i was so ungrateful for all the progress I had made and didn’t truly understand how much hard work and time I had put into that weight loss. I could only see everything I hadn’t accomplished yet. That, in part, was how I got back to this higher weight because I didn’t fully appreciate how wonderful it was to have lost 75 lbs. and how much better my body looked. I can truly say that when we have a “never enough” mindset we could weigh 100 lbs. soaking wet and still feel “fat” just because we still see the heavier person we were 100 lbs. ago. The hardest but best part about weight loss is the mental change of learning to appreciate hard work and how rewarding it is. PLEASE don’t underestimate how much you’ve accomplished to lose those 50 lbs. you are doing something AMAZING for yourself and if you learn to see it through grateful eyes you will feel so much happier. :slight_smile: I wish I could go back in time and tell myself “You look amazing! Not because your are at your goal but because you are trying!!” And if you find that you want to strength train to tone some of those annoying areas, that will help your confidence even more!! :smiley:

(Angelica Lopez) #8

I went WAY past my goal of 120 lbs all the way to 89 lbs (Im 5’2) and I still felt fat! I completely agree with Liz, the brain does take longer to catch up. I think it took me well over a year to stop feeling that way, but the thoughts do creep back every so often when I’m having a bad day. Just give it time.

(Doug) #9

:slightly_smiling_face: Impressive weight loss.

How we think of ourselves is quite a topic. The blizzard of media images and messages we are bombarded with may distort things. We humans are a variegated crew, and to some extent I think we aspire toward ‘ideals’ which are rarely realistic.

Good comments from others about how our mind takes a while to reflect our possibly-fairly-rapidly-changed physical state.

I never really felt “obese.” That was something that happened to other people. I was a skinny kid, then a muscular kid, and even in my late 50s I’m the same person I always was. (Right? :wink:)

Yet somewhere in there another 160 lbs had entered the picture, and even though I could still do everything, it was, “Damn, Doug, you’re getting to be a big fat bugger.” Officially, with a Body Mass Index of over 40, being more than 100 lbs over my ideal weight and having high blood pressure and diabetes, I more than qualified as “morbidly obese.” It’s still dizzying to think of that. How could that be? “Morbidly obese” - that’s a hell of a term. Sounds like you’re fat and gonna die.

I’ve lost 16%, with another 34% to go. Progress, for sure. Yet that’s only meant going from size 46 pants (which were, in all fairness, really tight) to size 44. I do feel a little better overall, and I know that good health benefits are accruing. That thickness - especially from the spine straight through to the front of the stomach (lots of the worst kind of fat in there) - that’s a slow-reducing area.

I don’t even know how I’ll feel when I get to a lot lower weight. Probably relieved that some real health concens have been taken care of. Mainly, I don’t think I’ll feel much different at all.

#10

WOW, so many great replies helping put things in perspective. I thought there may be some on here who had experienced this. So much good information and feedback I’ve read ever post a couple of times. Thanks so much for sharing and advice. Definitely helped me out.

I think I’m going to tape the picture of me with my grandson that finally woke my fat butt up to do keto to that damn mirror.

Thanks again for all the posts and any that follow.

(Karl) #11

I still see my 300+lb self every time I look in the mirror. I currently weigh 165 at 6’4". I reached my final weight 2 years ago. I say “Final” because my GOAL weight was 199 (the upper weight of a “normal” BMI). But I kept eating keto and wound up here at 165.

You get used to the dysmorphia, just like you get used to all those people telling you you’re too skinny, look like a cancer patient, yadda yadda. Eventually you just dismiss it outright or tune it out, and I’ve learned to ignore the extra 140lb I see in the mirror. I still “see” it, but it doesn’t steer my behavior the way it used to. I’ve loosened up a bit over time, and i’m less scared of gaining it back now than I was a year ago.

Refuting CICO platitudes
(Doug) #12

Excellent post, Karl.

Wow, for those who say that keto does not work… Cheers.

(Karl) #13

Yeah, turns out I’m extremely compatible with this lifestyle - and I’m very grateful for it.

Still feel like a fattie, tho! And that keeps me humble.

:slight_smile:

#14

Heh, I just had this convo with my SO the other day. I look skinny but feel fat, sometimes. Sometimes I feel pretty damn sexy. Depends on my mood and what I’m wearing I suppose.

#15

I experience the same thing. Dysmorphia is real! I’ve only lost 28 pounds and am down 1 pant size. I wear a small or medium top now and am between size 12 and 14 pants. Depending on the style some of my 14’s should no longer be worn, my 12’s feel painted on, but my 12 year old tells me they look great. Tried on a size 10 dress, it easily zipped up and was too big on top. However, when I look in the mirror getting out of the shower I still see the EXACT SAME FAT BELLY WITH the EXACT SAME FAT, BUMPY, TOO WIDE HIPS as I had before the 28 pound loss. This makes no sense. I have an estimated 40 pounds of excess body fat. My goal is to lose 25-30 pounds. But I look at my body and think “oh there is 20 pounds on that leg, 20 on this leg, 10 pounds on my waist, another 5 on each arm”… as you can see the math does not add up. I looked at pictures from 7 years ago, I think I am currently 50 pounds lighter and I actually thought, “I don’t really look any different” I’m not sure my clothing size then but I think it was at least an 18w. I am now able to wear a size 10 dress and the top is too big, I could not find clothes to fit me in most regular clothing stores back then. I would look at my jeans and think “wow those are huge.” Now I look at my size 12 and think “wow those are small, no way they fit me.” Today I wore a pair of low waist jeans that have been hanging in my closet for a year. I bought them without trying them on and could not wear them when I got them home. Forgot to return them. Today they fit great and they were very loose at the waist. That would be the same waist that I look in the mirror and see the same exact fat stomach. The brain is weird. I have never experienced this when losing weight in the past. But this time I was fat for 13 years. I went from size 8 to gaining 90 pounds in 4 months while pregnant. I lost about 45 pounds afterward but the final 40 pounds wouldn’t budge and after 13 years I managed to lose 30 pounds of muscle so today I am 10 pounds lighter than my size 8 weight but no way could I get a size 8 pant on yet. I’m hoping that when i get in those size 8 or 10 jeans I’ll finally give my body the respect it deserves and actually hope I’ll put on a swimsuit and not cover my legs with a pair of shorts. That’s my goal wear my swimsuit to the beach with no shorts over it because I think my legs are too fat!

(Jay Patten) #16

Just to piggyback on what others said…

I’m just a hair shy of 6’2" and I weigh about 220. When clothed I look quite lean, but I know that I still have flab around my waist. Even though no one can see it, I know its there and it drives me insane in my brain everytime someone at work complimemts me because I know “the truth.”

My wife signed me up for stich fix and I got a bunch of XL shirts that fit me great. But I mailed them back anyway because I’ve been wearing XXLT for a while now and I can’t accept the fact that they really don’t fit anymore (and look terrible on me).

It’s tough going through this process!

This reminds me… I really need to update my profile picture, lol. It was from 20 or 30 pounds ago, lol.

(Pete A) #17

I mostly still feel fat. The funny thing is my only real goal is to not feel this way, no matter my weight. There are lots of people who carry extra weight and somehow it doesn’t bother them… I could’ve been that guy but I’m not!

Now I’m actually thin and working on how goofy it is to still feel fat. Its more work than it sounds like. I look in the mirror way too much haha

(Sophie) #18

I catch myself doing this all the time, it’s crazy!

(Jay Patten) #19

@Pete_A

Yep, thats my goal, too. People ask “whats your goal weight?”

I dunno, jake gyllenhaal maybe?

#20

Fascinating discussion! Thank you all.

I think the only thing I KNOW is that my body image doesn’t match my actual size/shape.

Never has. Probably never will.

My mental image, from age 8 onwards, til now, aged 51 has been inaccurate. The pictures tell the true story, but I only ‘see’ the pics clearly after several years have passed.

Although… it actually doesn’t bother me.

I am over weight. High BMI. Obese.
A simple fact.
I also take care of my health, appearance, grooming, food choices, etc. I enjoy my wardrobe.
More facts.

I have no silly expectation of winding back time to my ‘best ever’, so I just kind of make the best of what I have, cos believe me, it used to be 60 pounds worse and several dress sizes bigger. :sunglasses:

Really grateful to you all for the thread. Makes me realise what changes have occurred. :grin: