I still feel fat

(Pete A) #21

Hahh nice to know you TOTALLY get!

(Liz ) #22

Right?? This winter I meekly said “Excuse me” to get by some ladies who were chatting, they both looked at me like “What” and I realized nobody had to move for me to go past, heh

(Karen Parrott) #23

Take lots of photos of yourself, look at them often. My coach told me this. She also said if I can’t identify with my normal weight body, then I’m much more likely to regain in weight maintenance due to internal identification.

It worked for me. 40 years of obesity, I was always the fat chick. Well, I’m not anymore, but it took a few years for my brain to catch up to my body and to not project that thinking outward, to teach others how I expected to be treated. When I told myself I was lean, strong, capable of not regaining the weight (I was a classic yo-yo dieter) - then others started treating me differently.

It starts with you, it will take time and strength and maybe some tears, too. But it will lead to your goals, not regaining. Hire a cognitive behavioral therapist to help you, if it’s too much to tackle yourself.

Best wishes and you are not alone!

(linda) #24

My friend is having the same “confusion” over her new self after bariatric surgery. She has lost 130 lbs rapidly. It’s a LOT to adjust to!! It is both exciting --all these options but also overwhelming. It takes a while to integrate the outside part of you with the inside part :slight_smile:
Read Self Compassion by K Neff. Check it out on Amazon to see if it might help!
Congrats on all your hard work and success!

(Lorraine) #25

I think I know how you feel. I started keto 9/20/17 and have lost 63 lbs in 7 months. I have about 45 more pounds to go, so I’m over halfway. I can totally see my progress, not only in the scale, but the way my clothes fit. I just purchased some work clothes at the thrift store so my pants wouldn’t slide down my hips while walking. But still, when I look in the mirror, I still see fat.

After analyzing this a bit, I have decided that, despite my weight loss, my shape is still the same. I certainly have a smaller mass, but I still have a lower belly roll, an upper belly roll and a thick layer of back fat. So, when I look in the mirror, I can still see those areas of fat.

I remind myself that the fat went on in a thin layer all over my body and that is just how it will be coming off. I am not going to wake up one day with a flat tummy and just chubby arms and legs. It doesn’t work that way. I try to remind myself of what my body actually looked like prior to starting keto. I can lie in bed and fold my hands over my tummy and remember that my fingertips didn’t even used to touch. When I get out of the shower, I can wrap a regular sized towel around my body and it overlaps a bit for modesty, even. No need for those giant bath sheets anymore. I can wear wrist watches and bangle bracelets again. I have a ton of room between the steering wheel and my tummy now.

If I think about it, I can pretty much remind myself multiple times a day how much thinner I am now than before and that goes a long way for making me feel better about myself after I have been a little disappointed by looking in the mirror. Every so often I look back at a photo my friend sent me from our cruise last year and almost laugh at how much of a difference I see now.

#26

Thanks again for all the great comments here, some really great feedback that has been helpful.

Two things that I think are going to help me (in addition to placing an old picture on the mirror). The first I did this weekend; I cleaned out my closet, and tried on some of my old clothes. Man was that an eyeopener. I even had to box-up some of the mid weightloss clothes as they don’t look good on, too baggy. Good exercise. It was interesting, a couple of clothing items that I’d bought thinking, I’ll wear this when I lose 25 lbs or so, too big.

Second, all my weight-loss is from diet, last time I had almost this level of success with weight-loss I did it with exercise and for obvious reasons it shaped my body differently, so I think I’m going to head back to the gym. Nothing crazy, some cardio and light weight training. I think that will be good.

Thanks again for all the input, it’s really helped hearing from others who have felt or feel the same way. Nice to know I’m not nutz!

#27

Brilliant, Brilliant, Brilliant!!!

(Kate) #28

I’ve got one little bit of wisdom on the topic of self-criticism. I spent most of my life looking at my flaws. For years I was too skinny, then for years I was too fat. My face and hair were never good enough. Now I look back at the those pictures and wonder why was I so harsh with myself? I am over 60 now and I can finally believe I look just fine.

I’ll bet you look terrific.

(Brian) #29

I honestly haven’t paid that close of attention. But every so often, I catch a glimpse of myself, maybe a reflection off of the big glass doors in front of a store front. It’s funny, I see that but really don’t see the same kind of image when I look in the bathroom mirror a few times a day.

Also, since I only started last August, it’s mostly been fall/winter and now spring so when I’m out, I usually have on a light jacket or at least a flannel shirt type thing that I’m wearing for one, and that’s often loose, not tucked in or buttoned up. But I have noticed the difference.

My eye does tend to look at what’s been the biggest part of me, the belly. I still have a kind of “flap” that’s hanging around the middle. It is reducing, but it’s taking it’s dear sweet time about out.

Other people are definitely saying stuff like, “Wow, you really have lost weight.” And then I’ll think about it. And I notice that it’s much easier to bend over and pick something up off the floor or get up out of a chair than it used to be.

I still have another 30ish pounds to go so it’s not like I have arrived. And the rate of weight loss has really slowed down dramatically. But I’m OK with that. I’ve wondered whether losing it more slowly may be better for the ol’ bod taking care of that flap around the middle.

Have been playing with a bit of fasting, mostly 24 hours or OMAD a few days a week to try to give the weight loss a boost. Also, trying to eat my protein, which seems to matter for me. (Yesterday was only one meal, supper, and I ate like a pig. But it was low carb and lots of protein. This morning, my weight is down, and that was before the BM.)

Yup, I still think of me in terms of, “That’s MR. FATSO to you!” LOL!! But I kinda think that will pass in time with enough reflections in store windows that affirm that I’m only half the man I used to be. LOL! :slight_smile:

(Bacon is a many-splendoured thing) #30

That’s my situation, too. If I look at my belly, I think I’m fat, but people who knew me at my heaviest all notice that I look better. I can actually see it in my face, and also, my ribs are starting to show through, also my legs are regaining their old shapeliness (I used to be real proud of them). And actually, for all that I still have a belly, it’s clearly a belly, now, instead of a large pillow strapped to my chest, lol!

One thing that does help is that my self-image was always of the thin person I used to be. I’d look in the mirror and wouldn’t see the extra ninety pounds. It is still something of a shock to see myself in photos—was I really that fat? It really does help, too, that the 38-inch pants that my sister gave me for Christmas now button, when they didn’t, four months ago. Granted, they’re still a bit tight, but I was able to slide them over my butt without unbuttoning them the other day, when I couldn’t do that even two weeks ago!

So no matter what the scale is telling me, there is indeed some progress. :bacon:

(Brian) #31

I’m with ya on that one. Facebook is famous for showing “4 years ago” or “7 years ago” or however many years ago photos. I cringe a little when I see pictures of me with the seriously extended bay window.

(Lisa marie t) #32

Thing is I’m weird I guess? I’m. Opposite Ive always felt smaller than I am.then I look in the mirror or reflections n see im really fatter than I am.every since I was a teen I’ve gone thru this.

(Ethan) #33

I’ve lost weight many times. Every time I lost weight, I felt fat still even when I was very skinny. It’s a self-image thing. When I gained weight later and saw pictures of myself at my skinny times, I could see that I was not fat.