I haven’t posted in a long time and need your help. I can’t decline. She knows I’m on keto but she’s a big carber and wine drinker.
I can drink water, no problem, but as for the lasagne, should I just eat around the noodles?
Yesterday was my first day back in ketosis since the holidays and I want to stay in. My keto flu was very bad yesterday, so I drank some bone broth, I still have a low grade headache. I don’t want to blow ketosis and start all over! I’ve worked too hard for this.
LOL! Should I eat my steak before hand? Then just pick at it?
Thanks Mark for replying!
Personally if I knew that some was aware that I was eating a certain way and hadn’t made any effort to fit in I wouldn’t go. But that’s just me.
Are you sure it’s not some kind of keto lasagne specially concocted for you?
A good friend invited us over for dinner and she is one of the few people who knew we had gone “low carb”. SHe also made a carb heavy meal. I think she wasn’t even aware of what a carb was she thought oh beans have a lot of protein. She made some Indian dal(think lots of legumes). I put a small serving on my plate and moved it around occasionally lifting my fork to my mouth but not really eating. I don’t think she even noticed. I helped clear at the end and was quick to scrape it into the trash.
I would just eat around the noodles, a lot of people don’t understand what a carb is.
I would graciously remind her that you do not eat pasta and tell her that you could make a keto lasagna (or other keto meal) to share with her. Let her know that you really appreciate the invitation and really want to spend the evening with her but eating those types of carbs makes you feel physically ill (whether they do or not). Who can argue and say, “I dont care that it makes you sick. You have to eat what I make anyway.” Well, maybe not in those exact words but you get the idea.
Let her know beforehand like others here have posted, about your WOE. Bring a big salad to share and maybe also a keto appetizer…I make buffalo chicken dip and eat it with celery while everyone else has it with tortilla chips.
That’s why no-one invites us but would invite you… a beautifully worded response.
I’d just eat around the noodles, too. It’s not hard to do.
I understand the whole “support my way of eating or I’ll bring my own food” idea and I certainly don’t have any trouble standing up for myself…I feel like, for me, though, it just makes too big of an issue of it. Kind of like making other people responsible for my choices. If she wants to make lasagna, she should be able to make lasagna. Then, I’d just eat around the noodles, or focus on salad, etc.
I would politely remind her ahead of time, and bring my own dish. Make it an educational experience. This won’t be the last time you get invited to dinner so now is the time to make sure everyone gets and stays on the same page. Spread the word!
Well, since you’re lipolytic again after the Holidays it’s really no big deal. I’d probably eat some of the lasagna, but just make sure to not eat again until I was hungry. Most if not all of the carbs will be used, with glycogen storage being minimal.
It’s unnecessary to refuse a hosts food, you just have to make adjustments like going in glycogen depleted and or working out before you go, and making sure the carbs clear quickly after eating them.
I feel like eating this way is my decision and not anyone else’s responsibility. Sure, having friends take my food needs into consideration is fantastic, but it isn’t their job. Bring a side that you can eat. Eat around the noodles. Enjoy the company of your friends.
Today I was at a friend’s house about lunch time and the food was 100% carbs (minus the chicken inside the breading.) I just enjoyed my cup of coffee. A couple people tried to get me to eat. I just replied, truthfully, that I was quite happy and don’t worry about me.
I think there are two main motives for food pushers. 1) They really are worried that you aren’t happy. Food makes you happy. 2) They know you are doing well but admitting that to themselves comes with guilt for not doing better themselves.
The solution to the first is to make sure they know you are content. Join the conversation. (Sometimes I have to make myself do this. I try to think of it as a gift to my friends.)
The second is harder, especially when you are new and enthusiastic. The one friend I think has partly been this way is getting a lot better about it. I’ve been working on not sounding judgmental about his carbs, and just waited it out. I say things like. “Those sweet potatoes look good, I’ll probably eat a little when I’m in maintenance but I don’t feel ready yet.” That way I’m not saying his food is bad. Recently he’s gotten much more supportive.
I think it’s also unnecessary to eat something that you don’t want to to please or not offend someone else. If she knows that her friend is on a special diet and is inviting her over she should inquire about food choices for the dinner. Would you invite a friend doing Jenny Craig diet over for chicken fried steak with gravy and mashed potatoes and biscuits.
I have influenced a friend - she has drastically reduced her carbs. I once joked and asked if I was being too pushy about keto. She said no, she was very grateful. She once bragged that she went a few days without crackers. She was fascinated by the fact that she was registering ketones (way higher than mine at the time, btw.).
Wonderful, beautiful advice everyone! You guys are keto champs. Love to you all.
I will follow your advice and I feel much better about being and staying in ketosis. Now that she will see what it’s all about, I bet she will ask about the way of eating (and not drinking) and start it herself.
you guys are the best. Thanks for being so supportive.
I’d concentrate on the wine part. Pick out the meaty & cheesy bits of the the carby dish. And would eat something I know I can eat before going over there. Concentrate on the company and not the food stuff.
Enjoy time with the friend.
Do what you want. Rationalize it any way you want. However, your post illustrates the difference between understanding the Science of a long term lipolytic nutritional pattern vs the concept of a “diet” heavily based on Nutty Keto Dogma.
This response is not meant to be either negative or personal, as I once thought the exact same thing. The term often applied to me (and others) back then (17 years ago) on an early Keto board was “Ketard”. It took several years for me to understand (and experience) the actual Metabolics.