Help! I'm in ketosis and my friend invited me to dinner. She's serving lasagna!

[Regina]

OP also is just getting back into ketosis.

[beccs]

I’d concentrate on the wine part. Pick out the meaty & cheesy bits of the the carby dish. And would eat something I know I can eat before going over there. Concentrate on the company and not the food stuff.

Enjoy time with the friend.

This. Eat beforehand and just enjoy the company.

[Janie]

strates the difference between understanding the Science of a long term lipolytic nutritional pattern vs the concept of a “diet” heavily based on Nutty Keto Dogma.

OP also is just getting back into ketosis.

^^^This.

The OP is starting over with keto and getting back into ketosis and fat adaptation. Your constant reminders of “Nutty Keto Dogma” may be ok for someone who is comfortable with keto and been at it a while, but I don’t think it is good advice for a newbie or someone starting keto again.

[CarlKeller]

She knows I’m on keto but she’s a big carber and wine drinker.

Then it’s a bit unfair of her to invite you to lasagna. I wouldn’t think of inviting a vegan to dinner unless I was making something that they are ok with eating… unless she uses zucchini instead of pasta for the layers.

[JohnH]

Personally I would go, not make any point or mention at all about my eating preferences, and just figure out how to eat around the parts you don’t want, while not making it obvious what you are doing. Easy enough to do if there will be a number of people there. Just chat and socialize and move the fork from plate to mouth as normal. Don’t engage on the topic of keto or carbs at all.

[cw2001]

Would you invite a friend doing Jenny Craig diet over for chicken fried steak with gravy and mashed potatoes and biscuits.

Maybe I’m in the wrong, but yes, I would. I would because it should be more about the friendship than the food. But then, I also wouldn’t be offended if she brought a JC meal with her, or ate before she arrived, etc.

I don’t think the responsibility is on the host to meet the dietary needs of guests. Especially these days when you can have vegan, gluten-free, dairy-free, carnivore, nightshade allergies, peanut allergies, etc dietary requirements. Tell people the menu when they ask, then let them adjust to what they need to do as necessary.

[Regina]

Yes, it’s a tough one because it’s a group dinner. Hopefully there would be some keto friendly sides but it doesn’t sound like it. I would definitely eat before hand then pretend to eat when you get there. The OP is experiencing carb withdrawal as it is - it’s very important for her to stay the course.

[PetaMarie]

I had to go to a group dinner a couple of weeks ago and lasagna was the main dish. I ate a crap ton of the salad offered and had one bite so I could comment on the lasagna. No matter what your diet is or where you are just discretely eat the things you want and don’t eat the things you don’t want. I mean, this is how people who eat everything do it, they eat whatever they feel like eating right then.

Making a thing out of it just makes a thing out of it.

[juice]

I haven’t posted in a long time and need your help. I can’t decline. She knows I’m on keto but she’s a big carber and wine drinker.
I can drink water, no problem, but as for the lasagne, should I just eat around the noodles?

“I’m sorry, but I’m on a diet for my diabetes and I’m afraid I can’t eat that.”

Personally if I knew that some was aware that I was eating a certain way and hadn’t made any effort to fit in I wouldn’t go. But that’s just me.

No, not just you…

It’s unnecessary to refuse a hosts food

That may well be true for YOU. However, just because it’s apparently alright for YOU does NOT make it a blanket rule to be trotted out every time the opportunity even vaguely arises. N=1 and all that.

“Nutty keto dogma”, indeed.

Today I was at a friend’s house about lunch time and the food was 100% carbs (minus the chicken inside the breading.) I just enjoyed my cup of coffee. A couple people tried to get me to eat. I just replied, truthfully, that I was quite happy and don’t worry about me.

This.

I think it’s also unnecessary to eat something that you don’t want to to please or not offend someone else. If she knows that her friend is on a special diet and is inviting her over she should inquire about food choices for the dinner. Would you invite a friend doing Jenny Craig diet over for chicken fried steak with gravy and mashed potatoes and biscuits.

Do what you want. Rationalize it any way you want. However, your post illustrates the difference between understanding the Science of a long term lipolytic nutritional pattern vs the concept of a “diet” heavily based on Nutty Keto Dogma.

Did you even bother reading the OP before you launched into your usual stuff?

OP also is just getting back into ketosis.

It doesn’t look like you did, because this was the entire point of the post.

[Regina]

but as for the lasagne, should I just eat around the noodles?

I just had an honesty check with myself. I could no more “pretend” to eat lasagna than I could fly. Eat a lot ahead of time, hopefully there will be salad, pass entirely on the lasagna (it doesn’t come up often but I tell people my doctor said to watch my blood sugar), and enjoy the company. On the rare occasions we get invited out to eat, there is always keto and non-keto food. So maybe that’s easy for me to say, but after much soul-searching, no, I could not “pretend” to eat lasagna. Stay strong!

[Regina]

Sorry, keep forgetting the carnivore part - scratch the salad.

[j.saltsea]

Bring a dish to share with everyone and eat just that. Tell her you didn’t want to be impolite but you have to eat the food that fits in your lifestyle so you figured you’d let everyone try it. Thinking a cheesy chicken alfredo with broccoli casserole or whatever.

[PortHardy]

Why not offer to make a Keto lasagna to bring too?

[juice]

Why not offer to make a Keto lasagna to bring too?

Excellent idea! A lasagne-off!

[Regina]

But I thought she was carnivore?

[juice]

But I thought she wa carnivore?

What’s wrong with an all-meat lasagna?

[Regina]

Hey, give me the recipe, I’ll try it! I’m having obsessive thoughts about lasagna now…

[juice]

Use sizzle/sandwich steak as pasta sheets, cheese is OK, cauliflower puree (cauliflower is an animal product), overlook the tomato, seems easy enough.

[Regina]

Thank you sir, that did it. I am officially over my lasagna craving…

[kandescent]

I would just tell her that I’m looking forward to the dinner, though won’t be able to eat the lasagne due to dietary restrictions.

For years before I started keto, I stopped eating wheat. It makes my joints hurt, causes me to gain weight, triggers overeating, and makes me feel overall miserable. I have eaten wheat to please someone before. They were happy in the moment. Then I dealt with the repercussions for months. No thanks.

If people offer me something that I don’t eat, I first decline politely. If they push, then I say I don’t eat whatever. If they keep pushing, I just say no. I don’t feel guilty. It’s my body. And I’m getting away from food as entertainment. No one is going to care about my health if I don’t. At Christmas, after eating a huge plate of turkey, chicken, ham, greens, green beans, gumbo, my friend offered me dessert. I declined. She pushed. I said no, I’m looking out for my health. She said I could do that tomorrow. Seriously, my dad died last year from diabetes complications and my mom has dementia. I’m not waiting to get a hold on my insulin resistance. If people are offended that I don’t eat their food, I just trust that they’ll get over it. I never feel like I’m depriving myself if I don’t eat something that makes me sick. It’s equivalent to them offering me rat poisoning or a box of nails to eat.

And I don’t try to pretend I’m eating or lie. People notice if you’re not eating food they have prepared. If I’m only going to eat around the stuff I can’t eat, I’ll say that and why. Otherwise, I don’t think it’s fair to be dishonest. Additionally, the issue will keep coming up if you’re not straightforward.