Sigh, really unhelpful talk


(Ellen) #1

Getting whiplash from how many rapid turns my manager is doing, great that I’ve lost weight and am getting healthier, bad when I said was due to cutting the carbs, apparently keto is a stupid & dangerous fad diet (cos we all know we need carbs to live right???), then today tells me she’s read a bit about it, it still sounds stupid to her but if it works for me…Then she tells me why she could never do it, which basically meant listing all the carbs she’d had over the weekend then saying don’t you miss them, they’re so tasty.
Yeah, they’re tasty but were killing me, so thanks for that but I’ll stick with my much tastier buttered steak. :cut_of_meat::cut_of_meat::cut_of_meat:


(Tom) #2

A case of telling her to piss off and mind her own business, or thinking that at least whilst delivering the same message more politely. Good luck and keep ketoing on!


(LeeAnn Brooks) #3

This is what I mean when I’ve said people like to sabotage others weight loss successes.

She’s clearly baiting you, trying to tempt you to cheat.

It’s hard to set boundaries with your superiors. But I think I’d try something like “it’s probably best we don’t discuss it as we aren’t going to agree” and let it be.


(Justin Traer) #4

That line, which I hear often, is really starting to bug me. It’s science, not magic & luck.


(Jane) #5

This is what I mean when I’ve said people like to sabotage others weight loss successes.
She’s clearly baiting you, trying to tempt you to cheat.

^^^ THIS


(Tricia) #6

Maybe she knows just how bad carbs are, but just doesn’t have the determination or willpower to do it to feel better!!
She could be jealous! :wink:


(Ellen) #7

Thanks all :grin: you guys always help cheer me up / give good advice. I just told her she could have some of the full fat cream cheese I have in the fridge instead of the lowest fat version she’s got if she wanted. Got me a glare but hey ho!


(Leslie Gardner) #8

When people roll their eyes at me, I just smile and walk away. I let my saggy pants hanging off my very reduced butt do the talking.


(Lonnie Hedley) #9

A coworker (who has a stint and is on statins) in the next cube to mine held up a bag of “fat free pretzels”. “My doctor says I need to do fat free”. I told him his doctor is making money keeping him sick.


(Jane) #10

Talk about the ultimate carbage - all carbs and no fat :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

My neighbor in Arkansas is T2D and is losing the battle with her blood sugar. She fussed at the amount of salt my husband put in a dish he was cooking for them at their house once.

This same lady picked Dairy Queen to go eat at after a group of us ladies did water aerobics at a local community center. Just so she could have a hot fudge sundae. Good grief! She probably thought in her ignorance that she “earned” the ice cream because of the minimal calories we burned in the water.

I had my bunless burger and they kept offering me fries and a bite of their ice cream and I politely declined. Saying I am on “low carb” doesn’t register with them at all. Two are elderly thin women so they couldn’t relate.


#11

Opportunity for personal growth – given that we are social animals, it’s natural that we are affected by the opinions of others; however, I find it helpful to remind myself that (1) these are external to us, outside our control, and (2) the opinions and “advice” offered by others are not made with our best interests in mind, but rather reflect their own personal challenges and struggles. In other words, even though the comments are directed at you, it’s not about you.

Easy for me to say – I can find myself overly affected by others’ opinions if I’m not careful.


(Allie) #12

What she’s really saying is that it’s not something she would be strong enough to stick with, and because she’s seen the results you’re getting, that makes her feel sad, jealous, and resentful.


(Brian) #13

This brings to mind something that happened to me this weekend. You might think it’s unrelated but I think it’s quite applicable.

I play the piano. And I had a big “gig” this past weekend. It started Thursday night and ended Saturday night. I spent a LOT of time at my keyboard, sometimes alone, sometimes with other musicians.

On the second night, someone complained about my playing, not to me, but to my wife. Said I was playing “too jazzy”. I hadn’t really thought much about it. I have my own style and that’s how I play. It’s sorta who I am. But it was just the one person. Others, person after person after person, dozens of them, I lost track, came up to me in front of the stage over the entire weekend and said how wonderful it was and how much they appreciated it.

That one comment really bothered me. And I wrestled with that one. I don’t play music to offend anyone, I want it to be just the opposite. I want people to truly enjoy. But there is a dynamic going on that I hadn’t fully considered previously. This guy’s son plays the piano but a different style. He apparently feels threatened if anyone rises above his son in the levels of appreciation seen in an audience. So in order to make sure his son keeps his elevated status, he had to tear me down some.

Realizing what was happening helped me to resolve the feelings inside of me. It wasn’t really about me. I have no issues with his son. I’ve played along side of him a couple of times on stage. He’s a good player but a very different style. I feel sorry for this dude. He’s a pretty small person that thinks he’s pretty important.

People can say some odd things to try to legitimize their own inadequacies. They can be hurtful at times. They can be frustrating at times. But just like in my case, you can’t let them take your success away from you because they either can’t do it or don’t want to.

Sorry for rambling…


(less is more, more or less) #14

Sorry? That was brilliant, thanks for sharing.

clap


(Brian) #15

Thanks, Screenack,

It was kinda personal… but I guess many of the worthwhile experiences in life are.

:slight_smile:


#16

You’re not too jazzy. Too schmaltzy, maybe, but not too jazzy.


(karen) #17

One of the things I struggle with is that I’m working very hard to get fat adapted, and at least right now, I can’t have “just a little piece of cake - (no really, just a little sliver like this, come on, it’s my birthday)” or “a few fries” to keep the peace. I’m ordinarily not thrilled with people pushing food on me but I’ll allow it, but right now I just can’t. People take this as rude, or like I’m some crazy fanatic going way overboard, but the reality is that it just won’t work. Chemically speaking, it won’t work. And I really don’t want to go down the slippery slope of explaining why, there’s just too much room for argument or seeming like even more of a crazy fanatic. You want to offer me a taste of your broccoli or your salmon in butter sauce fine, I’ll be cooperative all day about that.


(icky) #18

Love the wonderful replies on this thread!!! :heart_eyes:

I’m being so low-key about my Keto eating habits - I’m almost keeping it a secret.

I’m telling people who genuinely want to know and who I can see are genuinely struggling with diabetes/ weight.

As for everyone else - all those nosy co-workers and acquaintances? I’m saying absolutely ZIP.

If they offer me some carby food, all I say is “Oh, I’m doing a low-carb thing at the moment” and I say it really casually, like I’m just doing it for a week, or something and like it’s just some silly, unimportant thing I’m doing.

I do NOT NOT NOT want to get into discussions about my food choices with some of the foolz I’m surrounded with.


(Allie) #19

I scared my manager off when he asked what I was putting in my coffee… it was MCT oil powder and I lost him at “it’s actually pure fat…” :joy:


(LeeAnn Brooks) #20

Unless you employ jazz hands, I wouldn’t think you could be too jazzy.:wave: