Hello everyone, this is my second post now, my first one was about not losing weight. I’ve ditched the scales but I have embarked on a different ,much darker issue.
I have a history of mental health issues, I had a manic episode 4 years ago and was sectioned and diagnosed with Bipolar. I’ve had alot of issues with depression pretty much my whole life but I’ve worked really hard to get myself well and off medication, been 2 years now med free, however it has taken a tole on my waistline, the more content and happy I’ve felt, the more I’ve eaten. I now have about 80lbs to lose.
Keto seemed to be perfect for me. I love the food. I love the control it gives over appetite, this is my third attempt now but I hit this wall every single time, the anxiety and depression that sets in about a week after cutting the carbs down. I feel rotten, I know keto flu is a thing but this isn’t fixed with electrolytes. Ive managed roughly 3 weeks this time and this last week has been hell. I am exhausted, constantly anxious and restless, my heart races, I can’t sleep, I feel like I’m going to start hearing voices (very minimal and something I can deal with however I would rather not) and I have that dark feeling creeping back in that I worked so hard to clear myself from these last few years. This afternoon I made the mistake of going too long without eating , I then dosed off, I woke up ravenous and ate half a pack of biscuits. I’m okay with that, part of my recovery was to forgive myself and move on, I’m a pro at letting go of guilt and i was happy to just get back onto it but suddenly it’s like the sunshine has come out. I feel great (physically) have energy and I feel really peaceful and my heart is not racing.
It’s like night and day compared to how I felt just this morning.
Maybe keto just isn’t for me, I read so much about it helping with mental health. I’m so disappointed, I desperately want to lose this weight , become healthy, I was so convinced I would be able to push through this time. I’ve ordered some motherwort as it’s meant to really help with anxiety especially for women. I will still probably continue with keto though as I’m not wasting the food I’ve bought for the week but I’m losing confidence.
Please does anyone have any advice or experience, this is so serious I’m desperate to continue this WOE, diabetes runs in my family, but I can’t keep fighting my own mind because I’m exhausted
Thanks for reading