Kids eat CRAP

(Karl) #42

That’s the point I’m hoping I can get to with my son.

He’s expressed interest in my keto-ness. He saw first hand how it helped me, and goes absolutely nuts when I go on a Bacon Frying Binge :slight_smile: I told him he’s absolutely free to try it (the lifestyle, that is - because NOBODY ‘waits for bacon’), but I ask that we wait until the summertime when School is out, so he will at least have one less pressure to deal with.

That said, I worry (probably too strongly) about the possibility that one of his teachers will call me in a huff because I’m allowing my son to eat “all that fatty food.” As much as Keto’s helped a lot of us, it still gets a TON of bad press. But that’s a battle for a future time. Has anyone ever had to deal with a teacher or other authority figure expressing “concern” over a child’s keto or keto-like diet? How did you deal with it? I know a day may come where my son “embraces the bacon”, and when that happens I want to be able to deal with “everyone else”.

Indeed it is… We certainly live in interesting nutritional times.

I totally get this. As a parent, you have to choose your battles carefully - and everything’s a battle. My youngest (8) is fortunate in that he can pretty much eat whatever (and however much) and stay slim. But I know that won’t last. Still, for now I don’t have to worry about him. It’s my 12 year old that’s packing on the pounds, sneaking food, etc. I can take the hard-line approach like so many have suggested, but I’m sure that will cause resentment. My son’s crafty - he’ll get what he wants one way or another, with or without our help, and I can’t police him 24x7.

I do what I can, and some of it bothers me a lot. I have to lock the pantry closet to keep him out - and I feel really shitty doing this as I feel like I’m treating my son like a criminal that needs to be locked out. But as a parent, I have a responsibility to make his environment as compliant as possible so he can at least have a SHOT at being healthy. It sucks, but I guess these are the cards I’ve been dealt.

I really look forward to reading all these posts - ALL of them. It showcases how such a simple thing (kids eating crap) dovetails into a more serious problem that we parents are stuck dealing with.

(Jennifer) #43

My 15-year-old is tall, thin and metabolically healthy like his dad. He has been pretty good with the keto changes over this last year and has come to understand how carbs make him feel. He makes better choices because of it. He tends to drink unsweet ice tea when we go out, but will usually still get the bun and fries. But he also has stopped eating breakfast for the most part and just takes a coffee with HWC and a touch of sweetener to get him going in the morning. The only thing I still buy is an organic cereal that he snacks on every once in awhile with full-fat milk and the ocasional bag of pretzels or popcorn.

I just told the boys that I will not be making Easter baskets and handing out money instead. They were ok with that because they will still get crap from their grandmothers. SMH.

(Lauren) #44

(Ok, I lied. I came back in. But just for this.)

We gave up candy Easter baskets 9 yrs ago with my son’s type 1 diagnosis. Instead they get flip flops, new sunglasses, money, and/or other spring/summer fun stuff.

(Bob Weiman) #45

Another fun wrinkle: when your spouse doesn’t agree with you on the degree of harm the crap is doing to the kids and/or themselves.

(Karl) #46

Yep. I know that one all too well. My wife has always been right around 110-115lb her entire adult life. She never wavers. When I was at my heaviest, I swear - we looked like the number 10 standing next to each other.

Her view is one of simple moderation. And like the medical community, she blames the victim - at least she used to. She’s still baffled with the way I eat and the results it brought on. It’s paradoxical to her, and because of that it’s opened her mind up a bit.

Still a challenge when it comes to our obese son though. She keeps trying to say things like “Well, all you DO is sit around all day and DO NOTHING!” - I try to explain to her that that’s a symptom and not the actual problem. It’s slow-going, but my results showed her that maybe there’s another way to look at this.

(She had one feck to give and that feck is gone.) #47

I might be making progress with my 7yo :scream:. I’ve told her I don’t buy sugar. She came out of school yesterday with a blow pop in her mouth :unamused:. She handed it over but I made her a deal - any day she hands over crap she gets in school she gets a whole day of credit on her reward chart. (Each day is a buck toward an LOL Doll). She was thrilled with this concept!

I took the opportunity to explain to her that she’s very special and different from other kids because she’s v v v skinny and has a tiny appetite. I told her that every bite has to nourish her body so that she can grow (she really wants to grow). If she eats sugar it takes up valuable tummy room and takes nutrients away from her body.

I used this tactic because I knew she’d jump on being a “special case”. She’s at the age where she’s jealous of kids with glasses or allergies etc. She’ll love to tell her friends how careful she has to be with her diet :joy:.

I have finally discovered this kid’s currency! It’s only taken 7 years.

(Katy ) #48

It’s hard for our kids to change, too. I have put my kids through the WOE ringer. I’ve soaked grains, used rapadura instead of sugar, bought sugar coated cereal, tried Paleo, limited flour to one 5lb bag/ month, you name it. They think I’m crazy. Any attempts at granulated sugar or white flour replacement have been complete failures.

Ultimately, though, constant conversations about food choices and what is presented in the world around us has really paid off. My two adult kids ask me often for recommendations on how they can eat better. One is even trying to be Keto. My two teens just returned from a trip to Haiti and they commented that it was so nice not being surrounded by sugar. Meaning no temptations to go to Dunkin Donuts for a cup of “sugar.”

I cook up 5 lbs of bacon at a time, have eggs and avocados available. They can also cook burgers any time they want. I still make white bread for them but I figure it’s still better than store bought. Any family meals are completely Keto.

Just keep increasing their awareness. It’s a process and a journey for them too.

(Kelly Sawden Roberts) #49

See, I feel like you! I was adhd and never more than 120# by the age of 17, and I ate total garbage! I have no idea how I managed to think I was even “healthy” seeing as how I grew up in the 80’s and EVERYTHING fat free, lite, skim, etc. I watched my mom suffer and struggle with her weight my whole life. She eventually died of complications of dementia, T2D and heart disease. I was determined not to give my daughter a complex about food, choosing to teach her that food is fuel and really tried not to use food as a reward. She doesn’t have any weight issues but she is food motivated. She is hyper as well, and on a mild stimulant, which often takes away her appetite. What she does eat leaves a lot to be desired! All I can say is we try to buy plenty of keto friendly foods and snacks and I simply quit buying bread and cereal and try to encourage her to eat cheese and tuna or chicken salad as after school snacks.
My daughter likes to bake, so I try to find keto friendly treats she can bake :wink:
Good luck to you, it’s a fine line to not have the carbage and junk in the house, without making her feel restricted and encouraging eating disorder behaviors. I just tell her when she is out she should try to eat high fat and lower starch or sugar, but not making it so much of a rule that bad food becomes too “forbidden fruit.”
It’s a fine line we walk…

(Karen) #50

Sounds like
"EVERYTHING fat free, lite, skim, etc. "
your mom was shopping to buy you foods that, at the time, were considered healthy. Sounds like she was loving you. Sorry you no longer have her support. Raising children is certainly the toughest job you’ll ever love.

K

(Kirsten) #51

Is their mother onboard with the keto WOE? At their ages, (5 and 8?), they have no means to buy their own food, so you could potentially only buy low carb groceries.

My kids (16 and 17) each ate low carb for a month. My daughter lost 20 lbs and my son lost about 10 and his acne cleared up. The only way I could get my kids to try it was to pay them each $100. I let them eat fruit and higher carb veggies, but no sugar, bread, pasta, rice or potatoes.

I had to stock up on meat sticks, cheese sticks, tuna, celery, cucumbers, etc., so they could pack lunches and not eat the cafeteria junk.

Good luck. There’s still time for your kids!

(Sophie) #52

How did they feel by the end of the month, and did they stick with it? If so, that’s money well spent!

#53

Couple of things, H and I are keto. My kids eat a keto dinner. I do have rice available that they would have to heat up if they choose. While they are still growing I do not want to overly restrict their carbs. I know it may not matter, may even be good but my kids are not guinea pigs even if I am.

While I have stopped buying most empty carbs, I am not throwing out what I have accumulated. I do buy a loaf of bread (to be honest I do not think it matters if it is labeled who wheat or wonder bread, it is all sugar!) weekly and there is cereal available but not as much as there used to be and eventually I may stop. Perhaps after they come back from camp.

As for restricting or not, regardless of the diet, I do not think it matters. One friend had a very conventional stay at home childhood and her mom restricted her snacks (but not those of her thin brother). She was always heavy and is quite heavy. As a parent she thought the restriction triggered her eating (she used to believe eating was emotional, until she met me and we would debate it, I do not believe for people who had typical childhoods (no major trauma) that most eating is emotional and never have. With the Fung insulin hypothesis I feel this confirms it). With her children she used to have a snack drawer that the kids could access. Her first child does not take after her and is naturally slim. He enjoys snacks but does not need them. This worked well. Her second son takes after her, eventually she realized that he did not have an off switch and would eat unlimited candy or chips if given access to the snack drawer. So she limited what she bought. What finally turned him around is he wanted to improve his sports performance and is in high school and is careful with his diet.

I was not restricted in any way (my parents both worked and the babysitter made us whatever we wanted, I went through a corn flake phase, a spagetti phase, a hamburger with vegetables phase). We had a grocery store a block away so by the age of 8 or 9 I could buy anything I wanted (my parents were happy to pay for food). I did not start gaining weight until 13 but as soon as my father commented on it I developed a complex. I try to be very careful especially with my girls. One is heavy, one is not, but the heavy one really started gaining before I discovered keto and is now at college so beyond my reach. Only one of my boys is heavy and it is an issue since he is an early teenager.

What is making my kids more consicous is the podcasts I listen to all the time in the car. Since I am driving them each several hours a week they listen to whatever I listen to (they are welcome to bring head phones). I am suprised how much they and sometimes even their friends are learning. I have watched a few documentaries with them as well. Mostly because they were on and I controlled the TV at that time

I do think that letting kids know that weight is a function of not just what we eat but how we metabolize it is important. Weight is the last permitted form of disscrimination so any comment on weight can be viewed as an attack. I view it as blaming the victim. What I try to explain to my kids, since we have a family history of diabetes is that if you gain weight it is about insulin resistance which makes you hold on to weight differently than someone else and compels you to eat carbs. IR precedes obesity, not the other way around

(Kirsten) #54

They felt great, but did not stick to it. (Old habits die hard). They gained their weight back, but now that it’s prom season, my daughter is back on it and has already taken off 10 lbs in 2 weeks. I hope that this WOE becomes more natural for her so she can continue into college next year.

(She had one feck to give and that feck is gone.) #55

More progress with my 7yo! Refresher - she weighs 35.6lbs and seems to have a lot of food aversions (aka picky). She would eat NO fruit or veg and was trending toward a high sugar junk food diet.

She took the opportunity to choose NOT to eat any of the abundant candy up for grabs at the nail salon yesterday (special girls day with our friends) in return for a credit on her reward chart. We came home and she was “starving”. I have also stopped car snacking. The first thing she ate was at least 1/2 c of frozen raspberries and then some dried mangoes. Then she had a reasonable dinner. She was tired and was upset that there was no dessert, but it passed with some snuggles :smiley:.

She noticed other people shoveling in the candy and thought it was weird

(Stephanie Sablich) #56

Preach.

I crafted an unbelievably unhealthy relationship with food as a child and adolescent. Yes, we had junk in the house, but not in abundant quantities. My mom ran a licensed home daycare and we had three “balanced” meals every day and two “balanced” snacks, per state requirements. It’s not like we were just eating Doritos and Little Debbies all day.

I think my problem was two-fold. One, food in my family was seen as an emotional construct, not a physical one. It became a source of comfort in a situation that was often chaotic. Beyond that, though, I have a huge genetic predisposition to metabolic issues… so I was hungry ALL THE TIME. And by high school, I was trying to follow the nutrition advice I had been given- and hungry ALL THE TIME. I mean, binge eating entire pounds of grapes, eating four pieces of toast with fruit jelly- but it was whole wheat! Low-fat cheese, ridiculous amounts of turkey lunchmeat, etc… and I was constantly hungry. And then because I was working against my body and getting fatter and fatter… I was ashamed and started eating in secret. Food became shameful for me, and it became a vicious cycle.

I think that many of the problems people face in life generally have to do with the locus of control. Taking control away from children is not the way to create adults who have internal self-control. I don’t totally have the solution, but I don’t think it is as simple as becoming a dictator. Education is the key, and it breaks my heart to think about kiddos out there like myself. Massively unhappy, massively socially isolated, massive generally. I felt wrong and bad and ashamed every day of my adolescence, and no one should have to feel that way. Kudos to you for recognizing that there IS nuance here.

(Candy Lind) #57

A THOUGHT … is there any history of CVD or CHD in her family? Maybe a CAC score for all of you would open her mind a little further - ESPECIALLY if you get one on your son that shows calcium. If there is already evidence of calcium at his young age, she might be more agreeable to finding a solution. At the very least, you’ll know what you’re dealing with.

I am childless, but have 4 Godchildren. Both parents have weight issues, dad is T2D (as is his entire family), three of 4 kids are leaning that way, and grands eat nothing but crap. I hope with my progress that I’ll be able to persuade at least a few of them to ditch the carbs & find a healthier life. My goal is to save the next generation.

I would really love for our lawmakers to read this topic from top to bottom so they might see that sugar is not just causing physical disease, it’s been creating social/emotional/psychological mayhem for decades, as well. It is deeply frustrating to see the problem, the solution, and millions of people who need help (or are in a POSITION to help) who have blinders on.

(Jack Brien) #58

I’ve just bought some moulds and we’ll be making solid Easter eggs this year. And I shall make them eat every last sugar free mouthful :slight_smile:

(Chris) #59

Im quite frankly embarrassed at what we feed our 2 year old. Its a rotating schedule of chicken nuggets, fish sticks, mac n cheese. Always has a veggie with each meal, but still. Recently he has started taking an interest into my steaks so I think I need to make an initiative to have enough steak for him at each meal. Get some real red meat in the little guy. Each supper is a struggle to get him to eat. That is probably the #1 reason for our poor choices

#60

I tried watching Fed Up with my kids today (they watched Fathead with me)… I had to listen to them say “YUM” or some such every time a crappy treat popped up that the movie was trying to point out was poison. :angry:

I told my oldest he’d eat sugar coated dog turds… and I’m probably right. :candy: :dog2: :poop:

#61

It isn’t up to lawmakers, its up to us as individuals.
Quite frankly, I am sick to death of anyone who marches and bleats to take away individual freedom. We should be proud to be responsible for ourselves. Very few countries get that opportunity!