Keto Etiquette

(The o-chem police are coming) #1

OK, maybe a little silly but in all seriousness good manners and fitting in often causes good people to do bad things…
We’re invited to a Christmas Eve dinner with friends. We actually like them. They don’t eat so good. I sometimes don’t eat so good either, but not during the holidays. During the holidays I’m a frigging Keto saint. It’s just too easy to get to far off track. I digress…

Options: all start with some good exercise and fasting I’m the am.
-Eat at home then go to the party- likely but awkward since it’s for dinner.
-Go to the party and eat what’s most probably most ok-ish. -Also likely.
-Go and ask about everything; bring our own food too. Basically make an issue out of it. -unlikely

I usually keep my Keto to my self, unless someone asks. As much as I see the benefits for me and can see how it would help friends, I’m not a vocal ketoer. Mostly just wanted to start a conversation about holiday plans and management.
BTW I’m new to the board, not new to Keto. I like the community here. Lots of open minds and good info. I’m mostly Keto for feeling good, athletic improvement and weight management. Not to mention longevity and good health.

(John) #2

It’s usually possible to steer your way through the food choices at a party politely, unless the hosts are real food pushers.

I have not had to use this yet, but if I am passing on sweets, I can use “Oh, that looks great, but I have to watch my blood sugar. I have a family history of diabetes and my genetic tests show I am at risk for it too.”

That usually shuts down any discussion about people trying to get you to eat cookies or candy.

One nice thing about parties is that you can put a little of everything on your plate and nobody notices if you just don’t eat all of every different option.

(Auden) #3

I think do: eat a zero carb meal before you go, then eat some meat/fish/cheese to be polite at the dinner. Maybe offer to bring an appetizer and a dessert? Alldayidreamaboutfood.com has some great keto dessert recipes.

(Sophie) #4

This would be my option. I have a Xmas party tomorrow but it’s covered dish so I can take my keto stuff…deviled eggs and cole slaw. If nobody eats it but me, I couldn’t care less, but even all those SAD peeps love my stuff. One lady raved about my cole slaw then proceeded to tell my she didn’t like artificial sweeteners…I just didn’t have the heart to tell her. :smile:

(The o-chem police are coming) #5

Yeah, I think the polite refusal is a good strategy. It is always a fun mix when healthy eating and poorly understood restrictive diets meet food = love and holiday tradition.

(Laurie) #6

Bring your own food, but bring enough to share. Tell them you want to contribute some deviled eggs or a salad or a sugar-free dessert or whatever. They’ll probably say yes, unless it’s a really formal dinner.

There will probably be some turkey or ham, and some fairly “pure” vegetables, so you can eat those.

I’ve witnessed some dignified and powerful people turn down offers of food. They do it in a simple way: “I’m fine thanks,” or “I can’t eat certain foods.” Nobody gives them a rough time. If anyone asks you to elaborate, or if they remind you that it’s Christmas, just smile and change the subject.

#7

My recent experience…

Went to a family lunch function at an Italian household with loads of homemade pasta dishes, meats, salads, desserts and fresh fruit. My wife and I (both on keto) didn’t want to offend our guests (the family of my brother’s girlfriend) so we both decided beforehand to try a little of everything.

I preempted the upcoming carb intake by fasting at breakfast and also fasting afterwards at dinner.

Basically split lunch 60/40 keto/carbo, having loads of the roast meats and salads but also taking a little of the other foods like their pasta bake, potatoes, pumpkin to be polite (plus I wanted to test the waters for Christmas). Dessert was a complete carb/sugar blowout with cherries, mangoes and a large serving of a sickly sweet chocolate self saucing pudding.

Long story short, next day I was expecting bloating/headaches but none of that happened and I ended up losing weight! Most likely due to a) the fasting before and after the lunch or b) the high carb lunch broke a stall I was having and gave my metabolism a kickstart to resume weightloss.

Moral of the story for me- If you have self control and/or support of a partner also on keto, don’t be afraid to treat yourself once in a while. Prepare for and accept the consequences, reduce impact where you can (fasting etc), live a little and you might be surprised by the outcome.

(Carl Keller) #8

Welcome to the forum Greg.

Some tactics I picked up here include these pre-planned responses:

“Sorry. my stomach doesn’t agree with me right now.”
“Oh I couldn’t possibly have another, maybe later.”

Also, try to take advantage of the family dog if there’s one present. They are always willing to help you dispose of the really carby stuff. :wink:

(Cindy) #9

No, not really. At least, not without checking with the hosts first! LOL We rarely give our dog human food and 100% NOT at the table. So I’d be a bit unhappy with a guest sneaking food to her…matter of fact, when we have group dinners, that’s one reason why she’s in her crate.

(Carl Keller) #10

I was 98% joking Cindy. :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

(Cindy) #11

I know, I hope I didn’t sound snippy.

(Carl Keller) #12

Nah you’re good. :slight_smile:

(Cindy) #13

If this were a situation of your having a severe food allergy, it wouldn’t be an issue, would it? Or if you were having a medical procedure the next day that required you to fast or something. I don’t think hosts (or anyone else) are entitled to an explanation for what we are or aren’t eating. If they make an issue of it, then they’re the ones creating a situation.

I think you should eat exactly what you want to eat. If that means nothing suits you and you prefer to fast, then simply say “I’m here to enjoy your company” or something. Or pick and choose, whatever.

I think people really need to stop paying attention to what others eat. :wink:

(The o-chem police are coming) #14

Great thoughts. I guess the moral is to own the Keto. And the not worry about what others eat goes both ways.

(Brennan) #15

Studies have shown that 2 Tbsp ACV before a high carb meal can reduce the glucose/insulin response. If I know I’m going out to dinner and won’t be able to keep it as keto as I would like I’ll drink a keter-aid before I leave the house.

(Running from stupidity) #16

“I’m sorry, I can’t eat that, I’m managing my diabetes with diet.”

“You don’t have diabetes.”

“Exactly.”

(Raj Seth) #17

I tried “I can’t have sweets because I’m diabetic - doctor’s orders”, and they came back with, “you have to have some” :thinking:

No - I don’t!

(Marius the butter craving dude) #18

My worst experience was going to my vegan high carb cousin.
He did not ask me “Do you want a smoothie ?” but “Do you want more than five bananas in your smoothie ?”. And thus he put the vegan foods and smoothies in my face and stared at me to eat them in submission. After I left his house I got horrible stomach pain and diarrhea on the highway, I stooped at a gas station. I did a prolonged fast right after. The pain went away in 24 hours only.

(Raj Seth) #19

Oddly enough, forcing a vegan to eat meat is UNACCEPTABLE - but forcing a carnivore to eat Carbage - Salvation?!?! :rage::rage::rage:

In response to a vegetarian family member’s question - “but, don’t you get tempted to have some when you see delicious _______ (pakoras, bedmi aaloo, sweets, whatever…)” Those are Indian vegetarian temptations…
I said - “how tempted would you be with tandoori chicken, beef steak etc in front of your face?”

Made my point.

(Marius the butter craving dude) #20

One year ago my cousin visited me with a huge box. In the box there was a ton of vegan powders (spirulina, algees, maca etc) and some books that promote veganism, he also gaved me a long list of vegan books to consider. The gift was expensive.
I read a little. But 6 months ago I went keto and I am a new person. What he did was a challenge and maybe revenge.