Keto Complaint Department


(I stand with @juice, say NO to Trolls!) #1175

Keto Complaint Department: Keto made me a pool boy.

I used to be a intellectual man, now I’m just an objectified play thing. :frowning_face:


(Eric) #1176

I’m always going to the store for :bacon: and :fried_egg:

But Bacon is life!


#1177

I no longer have to move the table outward when I sit down at a restaurant, as my stomach no longer gets in the way!!!


(Tara) #1178

Real actual complaint here.
A lot of the best keto recipes that I’ve tried all have egg in them. My son is allergic to egg, wheat, and peanuts. It gets a little difficult sometimes. I feel like if I want to be keto and also keep my son from having an allergic reaction, then its like double the work. :upside_down_face:

The best compromise so far is Carl’s head pizza crust. Thanks for the recipe @Carl_Franklin


(Drew Says "Eat the Salt, you damned stinking Keto ape" Hardcore Label Licka ) #1179

Hi Tara just an idea but how about Xanthan gum and water you will need to experiment to get it right. I use it as a thickener and I bake with it. It was a pain at first (it clumps like corn flour) but I learned how to use it by using it and now use it all the time.

Cheese Fondue: Grate cheese’s of choice and lightly dust with Xanthan Gum,
Heat slowly, Serve and keep warm, Dip bacon in or anything you like.


(#inforthelonghaul, KCKO, KCFO) #1180

For baking things for him like keto brownies or breads, try this:
1-1/2 tablespoons avo or olive oil mixed with 1-1/2 tablespoons water and 1 teaspoon baking powder per egg . Make sure you use powder and not soda, they do different things.

Vegan substitutes can be found here, but not all of them are keto friendly, but I have keto vegan friends who do fine with the chia and flax seeds solutions,
http://joythebaker.com/2014/09/baking-101-favorite-vegan-egg-substitutes/


(Adriana) #1181

I have used chia and flax meal as egg substitutes and both work great.


(Diane) #1182

Leanne Vogel has developed a lot of recipes that are egg and dairy free.

She has a cookbook you can buy on Amazon but also has a lot of free recipes on her website:


(Tara) #1183

Thanks for the feedback! I’ll try not to give up hope. I definitely want to figure out a basic bread recipe that is both keto and egg free, gluten free. I buy him some really expensive stuff from walmart and it would be nice to stop doing that.
He hasn’t had chia seeds or flax seeds yet, but xanthan gum is in a lot of stuff and I think we are good there as far as allergic reactions.


(Cynthia Anderson) #1184

Tara I completely understand. My son is allergic to all the same things plus dairy.


(Cynthia Anderson) #1185

I don’t like bread anymore.


(Drew Says "Eat the Salt, you damned stinking Keto ape" Hardcore Label Licka ) #1186

Hi Tara sorry my brain was not working so well the other day. I do Carl’s head pizza but I
add 1 tsp of Baking Powder, 1/2 tsp of Xanthan gum and a 1/4 tsp of Cream of Tatar, I’m still experimenting with the mix. I add this to the Almond flour and mix in well before adding it to the cheese. I let it rise in the oven. Do NOT prick with a fork once it’s browned on the top flip it over and brown the other side. Open oven door and leave to cool in the oven. It don’t last for more then two days, but It’s easy to make and it makes lovely sandwiches or bread sticks which are a big favourite with friends kids one of which likes to get a dippy thing from the shop and then gives away the sticks that come with it and asks for one of my sticks.

Hope any of this helps
Drew


(Drew Says "Eat the Salt, you damned stinking Keto ape" Hardcore Label Licka ) #1187

I had to stop doing that. I now buy mine in a 10 pound pack, it saves me a fortune on fuel.


(Tara) #1188

Food allergies are tough. My son is lactose intolerant, so he’s alright with cheese and yogurt. How old is your son? Mine’s almost 2. I’ve been testing out different cake recipes so maybe he can actually have a birthday cake this year. I’m really nervous about how things will go when he starts school.


(Tara) #1189

Yeah same here! Thanks a lot keto… now I have this love/hate relationship with bread.
Bread, 10 things I hate about you:

  1. I hate the way you are so difficult to make, especially keto-fied.
  2. I hate the way you fill up and expand in my stomach and make me not want to finish the rest of my food.
    I’ll just stop because this could go on…

#1190

I’m SO COLD in the office. :cold_face: :snowflake:

I used to head outside for lunch in the winter wearing only a T-shirt and have colleagues comment, “Aren’t you really cold?” and genuinely not feel a thing. I had my own natural layers, you see.

Now I am seriously cold almost all day long and that’s wearing a shirt. Need to start layering up…


(I stand with @juice, say NO to Trolls!) #1191

@Gaff, I finally bought a jacket to leave in my office, so I could put it on anytime I was cold.


(Diane) #1192

Just the opposite here. Find myself removing layers because I get too warm too easily. This isn’t just due to warm weather, it was also true last winter.

I’m thinking it’s either hormones readjusting as my body heals, or possibly my BMR raising my body temperature slightly (with increased mitochondria in my fat cells, hopefully?) and possibly burning more calories.


(Take time to stop and eat the bacon!) #1193

Known as “the keto way of heating”! :rofl:


(Drew Says "Eat the Salt, you damned stinking Keto ape" Hardcore Label Licka ) #1194

My Keto warm up workout. :bacon: powered Star Jumps people. :muscle::joy::rofl::joy: