Guilty cheat week - have I lost my adaptation?

(Eric Keegan) #1

I’ve been keto for 6 months and have began intermittent fasting as a tool in order to keep me in keto.

My gf wanted me to eat some normal food during the holidays and she gets a little offended when I decline. She is a chef and loves people to eat her food. For 5 days until Christmas I haven’t been as strict as I normally am and I think yesterday after dinner and some dessert, my body finally had enough. Woke up this morning with a tummy ache and felt nauseous. Fasted all day and vowed to go back to keto.

I feel guilty because I know I went to carb hell this week and I am worried I may have undone all this hard work.

Will I need to start from the beginning? I remember reading somewhere that according to dr phinney you have to start without your adaptation.

(Laurie) #2

I’m saddened that a girlfriend who is a chef wouldn’t take up the challenge of cooking delicious foods that suit your way of eating. Maybe you can nudge her in that direction.

(Joey) #3

@Eric_Keegan Welcome to the forum. Great to have you with us!

I won’t attempt to guess what’s going on inside your body - but I doubt you’ve screwed yourself over metabolically with this little holiday detour on your keto path. Best to learn what you can from the experience so as not to waste a perfectly good belly ache.

To be blunt, I think you have some “gf management” issues to address. If she gets to decide what you ingest, you’re off to a rocky start to a troubled relationship. If what her “bf” eats is that important to her, you’re not going to be a good long term match. Deal with it.

I rest my case.

Welcome! :vulcan_salute:


Doesn’t even remotely work that way, you’re just as adapted as you were. The fear of being “kicked out of ketosis” is stupid. You eat carbs, you burn them back off and you’re fine. That and you only have to burn the liver glycogen back off and you’re back. What your muscles sucked in doesn’t count since they don’t give it back, that you burn off by your muscles using it. The scale can’t tell the difference but that’s not working against ketosis and that weight isn’t bodyfat.

(Eric Keegan) #5

Me too. She gets a little annoyed that I follow a diet and prefers me to have more carbs but I explain to her that I feel much better on very very very low carb. As a chef she like me to try new things and I do occasionally do that when she creates a new dish but for the most part I’m very very strict.

(Take time to smell the bacon) #6

Dr. Phinney does say that a long enough binge can damage mitochondria and cause us to stop being fat-adapted, thus requiring a re-adaptation period. But do consider this: you haven’t wasted the past six months, and in the context of the next sixty years this is just a blip on the radar, not a life-ending catastrophe. It may be difficult to get back on track, but you can do it.

As for the point about relationships, it is not a good sign that your significant other gets to determine your level of health. You are entitled to do whatever is necessary to take good care of yourself.

Perhaps the two of you can reach a compromise in which you can appreciate each other’s needs. And perhaps you can get your girlfriend to see the other gifts she gives you, so that cooking you unhealthful foods will become less important to her. But in any case, you have to decide whether your long-term health or the immediate needs of maintaining domestic peace will take priority. I can say from experience that the sooner the two of you can work out your differences, the better. Postponing with dealing with a situation like this only makes it more difficult.

(Eric Keegan) #7

:rofl: yes I do have gf issues. She is a chef and I love her but she finds my diet too restricting but she doesn’t seem to understand that for me this is a lifestyle choice and I feel better than I have ever been in my life. I wake up more energized and more healthy.

(Eric Keegan) #8

Yes my gf is a little bit stubborn and thinks a little bit old school. She still believes in a carb heavy diet. But I think it’s more a result of her upbringing. She is from a third world country and doesn’t seem to see the benefits of keto but slowly and surely I am getting her there. One thing she does do is admire my commitment but prefers I eat more carbs. But when I am in keto I feel like a new man. My only regret is that I didn’t do keto sooner.


I don’t think one loses fat adaptation so easily but of course I don’t know what it takes to lose it and I just suppose things, it’s not like I could ever measure if I was fat adapted… I just used my experience. I suddenly changed after 7 weeks on keto and I suppose that was my fat adaptation (some basic level, at least). I never ever lost the benefit I got during my on/off keto years but sometimes I felt it’s not so great so I dropped my carbs again. I didn’t do high-carb weeks after I went low-carb but one high-carb day or low-carb weeks happened, they were seemingly fine. But this is me, I don’t know how it works for others.

Losing my water weight changes may be my other level of fat adaptation, maybe? I don’t gain any weight if I suddenly eat a lot of carbs. I never lost this either I think but surely not for years, I stopped weighing myself as my weight is almost always the same.

Even if you lost fat adaptation, you still have the experience with keto. Your body probably “remembers” it too. You have keto habits, maybe not strong ones, I don’t know but you have practice. As time passes, eating less carbs are way easier for me and having carbier times don’t seem to have an effect (if I overdo carbs, eating less carbs gets loads easier, actually the only option but I try to avoid that, sugar poisoning isn’t fun and it’s rude to my body anyway).

But I can say… You can’t change the past. So do the best from now on…? :slight_smile: I would be curious myself but what you should do, that isn’t affected by the answer. Drop your carbs and give your body what it wants. If your body is smart and likes keto, at least. Mine always wants something close to carnivore, it’s my other parts that make me stray away…

And I’ve heard that even if one isn’t fat adapted yet, eating off doesn’t undo ALL the work. So it’s not that simple to undo all efforts :slight_smile:

The girlfriend issue… It’s so odd to me. It shouldn’t matter what she believes in or prefers (maybe a tiny bit) as it’s not her woe and life and health. And it’s not even some experimental “it feels strange but I give it some months” change, you already feel BETTER. Isn’t it make thing clear? Your body loves it, you should do it?
And you have all the right to decide what, when and how much you eat - at least as long as you don’t do something extremely bad. It’s something very personal, it’s odd to me people don’t see that. No one ever should be offended I don’t eat something but I have a responsibility to have an okay woe, not something that damages or hurt me. She can’t expect you to hurt yourself for her… It’s not love IMO. I don’t know how she thinks but I surely would talk about things with her. Maybe she would understand or at least accept. One should respect the other person and their dietary choices. Discussion is fine but coercing someone to give up their well chosen woe even for a short time…
If I go off keto, I wanted that. It’s still not necessarily good but at least I made a decision about my own diet.

Most of us was raised on high-carb and bad stuff. We can learn and change.


yea I get it. too new to find YOU in all this.

what do you require for health? either find it in your eating journey path or say screw it an listen to others on what your health should be and how that will fail…you came into this for a reason, WHO IS TO take that from you? No one

a chef…omg that is tough LOL

time for big boy pants. Say I AM DOING ME and don’t aske me to eat or taste or whatever and say to your girlfriend YOU DO at all times and I support it but what goes in my mouth is all my focus and no one has a right to inject or get in my way how I want to eat for my personal health changes.

and darn, it works when ya say it, others get ‘very mad’ for a bit and then most ‘get it’ and realize you have to do you :slight_smile: but you must always allow them to be them too in their food choices without judgement. Focus off food intake :sunny:

you will be ok. chat it up, show your force, what you need, allow the other to have their needs and the 2 shouldn’t be an issue if everyone allows each of us to be us :slight_smile:

(Eric Keegan) #11

Thanks for the words my friend :sunglasses:

(Robin) #12

Yes, we all share that one regret. Why didn’t we do this years ago? That’s one reason I don’t get frustrated with folks who would benefit from keto but are still eating SAD. We were all there once. And someone rubbing it in my face, wouldn’t make me change. It would only make me avoid them.

Every time I see an obese person now, I can sympathize but keep my mouth shut.
But, if they ASK? Buckle up, baby! :vulcan_salute::vulcan_salute::vulcan_salute:

(Robin) #13

@Shinita and @Eric_Keegan
Many people use food to show love. It’s their love language. As a Chef, it must be doubly hard for your girlfriend to not be able to lavish you with incredible food. I used to cook for people as a way of showing my love for them. Each happy bite they took was an affirmation of my love and ability.

Just have THE conversation when nothing is going on… after the holidays. Handle it (and her) with kindness and good intentions, and you’ll probably be fine.


But it was already said that she just should make keto food, how hard is that? It’s not love to force bad food on someone…
I bake and cook carby food for my SO. And keto and carnivore food as he can eat that too so it’s easy for me… But I never expected him to eat in a certain way (just kind of healthy but he is health conscious and even does what works for him so I am lucky again). It’s quite a silly idea anyway, people are close to impossible to change, that must come from within. (It’s easier to tempt them than make their diet more restrictive, that’s true.)

I have good experiences. Whenever I changed my diet (and it wasn’t too extreme yet… :D), most of my relatives simply cooked the right food (or close enough. or partially) when I visited. They weren’t even chefs… It’s basic respect, love and hospitality, I think.

(Marianne) #15

Oh, dude, I know you didn’t come here for relationship advice - and I’m not going to give it - just express my opinion. Forget that. Take the high road, don’t argue, defend or apologize for your choices, just tell her unequivocally that you don’t do carbs. End of discussion, and don’t try to sooth her feelings. They’re hers to manage; you’re not doing anything wrong. If she gets into a snit that lasts for hours or whatever, you may eventually reach a crossroads. Why don’t you ask her to cook you delicious meat, like roasts or steak? That may be a slippery slope, depending on what she chooses to put in them or if she insists on including vegetables or other ingredients that you don’t want to eat. You will have to determine if that is worth it - probably not, on second thought.

I cheated bad at a wedding a few years ago and the guilt I felt was crushing. What a horrible feeling. Brought back years of the pain and hopelessness I had felt when I was active in my food addiction. It was lingering and difficult to shake, plus I was consumed that I was going to go right back to being a slave to my addiction. Thankfully, I got right back on and stayed on.

Good luck and best on your keto journey! Sounds like you are doing great.

(Joey) #16

As a chef, she’ll need to grasp the notion that she does not decide what patrons order off the menu. On the contrary, she prepares what they order.

I think she may struggle in the restaurant biz if she keeps stepping into the dining room to instruct the patrons as what to eat based on what she has the urge to prepare. :wink:

Meanwhile, keep taking good care of yourself (and her too).

(Bob M) #17

It’s not a big deal. If you fast, start a fast sometime, say the first week after the new year. If not, just get back to eating low carb/keto.

(Joey) #18

Bingo. What @ctviggen says.

You lived decades (I’m presuming?) before cutting out the carbs… and you’re still alive. Just get back on the horse and continue along the path where you’d jumped off.

But having paid tuition, don’t miss the lesson. Remember that crappy feeling? It ought to be an incentive to stay the course more consistently going forward. :vulcan_salute:


Losing my adaptation - isn’t that an R.E.M song?

Thank me, for the earworm.

(Robin) #20

Thanks a lot