Emotional eater, keto weapons wanted

emotional-eating
#1

Hi everyone from this community. I read, follow and cross information from different threads, thanks all for your posts !

For about nine months I was pretty good into Low Carb, then keto and even fasting. Keto was new for my surroundings : work and family (I don’t live in the U.S. A lot of skepticism : my partner is a farmer’s market salesperson, and can eat three mangos a day ! My mother, when she saw that I was not going into her “sugar trip” made my holidays impossible. My mother in law, was reciting full pages of Dr Grundig and running an eating competition. Other more vicious friends kept bringing chocolates and crap to the house… My only silent supporter, my general doctor, left her practice for a full year after an accident. On top of that, I had a very difficult time at my job… and I just quitted keto:rage::angry::rage:… I was also fed up with the amount of isolation and diet talk I had to endure…
But then I saw a couple of my siblings at hardly 70 : cancer, diabetes, breathing helps, overweight, million of medications. I got scared ! I can be therein just around the corner !!!

At 55, I have done probably every existing diet, with or without doctors, I am a professional yoyo dieter. I am active, biking to work every day, but I have 20 pounds to lose that seem to be my emotional cushion that make go from the high rate of a normal BMI to the edge of obesity.
I want to get rid of those kilos once and for all, it is pitiful to have a three sizes closet… among other things.

What I am learning :blush:
When I am in the low part of the scale, I feel well, I dress decently, I rock. But I am isolated by food restriction, and tend to accept that a little cheat is fair… BUT LITTLE CHEATS ARE JUST A DOWN PATH FOR ME !, dah obvious.
Doing Keto has proven the most pleasant way to eat with restriction : I love avocados, butter, coconut, cheese, eggs, even spirulina, hemp and others… I am less of a meat lover, but can do ok with fish and chicken. I adore every vegetable on earth and many fruits.:cry: that is what I really miss !
I am a gourmand. With keto, I certainly loose weight, not in a miracle speed, but I realised that I am very much not into eating pre-written menus, which is the fastest way to avoid agonising counting in apps… specially when busy.:crazy_face:

Gaining trust or indifference from opposition is hard and ends up weighing highly in bad moments. And one day the cup fills and DOWN WE GO INTO THE CARB HELL, even if keto has been my best fight… here I am back into my bigger me.

GOOD NEWS, I AM BACK INTO KETO but i realised that I NEED TO DEPLOY EVERY WEAPON TO STAY IN THE LOW PART OF MY YOYO.

I won’t post a poster of a top model on my fridge, but rather of my loving siblings whom are so unhealthy by their way of eating…
I will have to come back to meditation, yoga or other calming durable method of stabilising my emotions.
I am fasting more often… I won’t deny the difficulty of the first two days, but honestly, I love the feeling of not setting foot into the kitchen, not dealing with other people endless conversations about diet and food that come so often during meals…
Having a reliable bread recipe is important for those moments … hey no microwave for me :no_mouth:
Any other tips ?

Thanks you all !!!

#2

It’s not so bad. I’m very similar but I don’t like most of the leafy green ones so I don’t eat them and dislike avocado too… But I adore most of the rest and I refuse to give up most of my veggies, it’s easier with fruits. But no one can take away my banana or cherries. Low-carb veggies aren’t safe either, I had to ban fried cauliflower soon after I went keto, I couldn’t eat little of it.
I slowly learned to enjoy the hell out of my zillion veggies and fruits on keto. The amounts are small but I realized it’s almost as good. I don’t even feel I would like to eat my old amounts after some years. I eat fruits every day but I need my carbs elsewhere so I often spend 1-3g net carbs on them. But I make that few carbs count. I usually use raspberries, sometimes cherries (or banana but that’s a flavoring and sweetener, not really a fruit to me), all frozen, often with chocolate. Veggies are trickier but raw veggies work better. Light vegetable soups, fried veggies in scrambled eggs, not so much carbs but it’s satisfying… Spicy tomato puree for my eggs and raw veggies… So good.

I have a small but nice fruit garden, by the way. And I love all the fruits there, from early May to December. Not eating more than minimal fruit is so easy when I have no fresh fruit but when I have, it’s a different story. But I made progress and enjoy my garden (and love the fact my SO is a fruit lover high-carber so someone eats the fruit and feels just great afterwards, without getting fatter).

I cook and bake for my high-carber SO, without meat (and I do my best to cook the same main dish for both of us. My options are limited and even when I find something, my SO often wants raisins or potatoes in it). But no one talks bad about my diet, thankfully. Not like it would have a big effect, I just wouldn’t talk with them much anymore.

So yep, it can be tough if the circumstances aren’t ideal. They usually aren’t. Be strong and even if you break keto, DON’T start to eat tons of carbs. Do low-carb with more veggies or fruits or something and come back soon. If you fail, fail less epically, it’s better for your health and confidence.

#3

Thanks so much for your advice ! You really got the words : Failing less epically, that’s it… I figure out that if I can have here and there some of my carbs invested in fruit, I might survive. My SO is realising that falling of keto takes a big toll on me… so I am starting having an ally.
Thanks :smile:

(Kristen Ann) #4

I’ve been an emotional eater my whole life until about 3-4 months ago. I think I’ve kicked the habitat for good finally. Here were the keto weapons I used for my emotional eating:

  1. Shove fatty protein in my mouth until I’m so full that I couldn’t eat carbage if I wanted to. (Usually ribeye or pork shoulder)
  2. Make keto chocolate chaffle with chocolate mouse. Only takes about 10 minutes.
  3. For me the turning point was when I had been eating my emotions weekly in ice cream, and I just one day decided to stop doing that because t would probably kill me. Ever since I made that decision, I haven’t eaten my emotions (keto or otherwise).
  4. When I was going through emotional hardships this summer I went mostly carnivore and it squashed any emotionally driven cravings well actually all cravings. I’m not longer carnivore, and still haven’t had any cravings.
  5. I think going to therapy helped me even though we don’t talk about eating habitats or anything. I think just being emotionally healthier has helped in general.

Hope this helps! Good luck, you can do it!

(Kimbrie Sauvageau) #5

Hi sis, I totally know about the emotional eating thing. It has literally been my “crack cocaine” my entire life. If I get upset or stressed I dont eat 2 cheeseburgers, I eat 6…so overeating is a huge challenge as well. I am brand spanking new so I have no real point of reference, but I do know how excited I feel, honestly relieved actually to have this great structured lifestyle modifying system to help not only me get healthier physically, but to heal the emotional side that cant pass a McDonald’s…EVER! My toughest challenge I think will be giving up my beloved craft IPA’s. But I know myself after 41 long winding years and I know this, for me cheating cant be an option. Because I wonr stop at just one beer, and I most certainly will eat that entire bucket of chicken and those dozen Krispy Kreme donut. After which I will throw the evidence away before I get home, not cause my fella is a jerk, but because I am ashamed, so horribly ashamed. Something has to give, now is the time to train myself in some new healthier habits so that I have plenty of time to spoil my grandkids. Best of luck to you and dont be too hard on yourself, no matter how far you fall from that horse you can always catch up and jump right back on, taking control of your goals.

(Marianne) #6

For cravings, I would just make sure you are eating sufficient quantities at each meal to hold you comfortably and without cravings until the next. If I find I am “hungry,” or craving something in between a meal and it doesn’t go away after 15 minutes, I will have several slices of bacon or a chunk of pepperoni, olives or some pickles.

Good luck.

#7

HEY GIRLS, YOU ROCK !!! THANKS FOR YOUR ADVICES !!!
I think you all have a point… do not be hard on me ! That is for sure. I just feel that I am going to grow old (if) going up and down… it’s like some Sysiphus !
So far I am getting back right now and count one only day, today, until I get back my rhythm.

Do you guys cook all this low carb cookies and cakes you find on the internet, or is it a bad idea ?

(Rebecca 🌸 Frankenfluffy) #8

What’s your safe place, @vialis? A certain bench in the park? A particular walking route? A friend’s swing seat? A drive in the country? The pool? The restroom at work? A phone call to someone special?

Mine is my bed. And yes, on a tough day I have been known to send myself right back there, never mind the (work) consequences.

I also keep a spare hairband on my wrist. A hard ‘ping’ on that is enough to snap me back into myself.

Whatever you do, you’ve got this. You’re doing great!

(Rebecca 🌸 Frankenfluffy) #9

I don’t! #trigger

(Kimbrie Sauvageau) #10

Oh my you said the B word…quick step away from the light lol

(PSackmann) #11

I don’t either, I try to stay away from artificial sweeteners as much as possible.

For cravings, if a glass of water doesn’t help, I’ve been known to have a pat of butter with some salt on it. Works every time for me!

#12

My downfall is when you decide that I will have cake, or whatever I can’t gracefully not eat, thinking i’ll just exercise and fast those carbs away. Generally I feel crappy after carbs, my body aches, I sleep poorly . . . but it’s the food funeral that is my downfall - a side trip to the supermarket to buy whatever caught your eye (ooh, mangoes are in season).

It’s hard to convert from food treats. When you think back to how we reward ourselves it’s generally food - because we ‘deserve it’ . . . and maybe it’s better to carve out some space in your day to reward yourself in other ways. My current fave is to walk the dog, then sit and drink my coffee (generally reading) while the sun comes up. I let myself ignore the pile of ironing (although that feels good to get thru too), or whatever chore could be done before getting ready for the day.

I probably need to write a list of goals and accompanying rewards . . .

(Marianne) #13

Hon, don’t you worry - we got you!!! You are learning; we don’t all do this the same way. We each have to find what works for us.

:hugs:

I can only speak for myself - for me, I cannot do the keto baking. I have a serious food addiction and relationship to food. It’s taken me years and years to learn to give that the respect it deserves. I am too prone to binge on food that is too much like SAD food or my favorite binge foods. I am afraid keto baked goods or other things that replicate my favorite binge foods would take me too close to the edge of the abyss. It’s okay, though. I have developed a repertoire of delicious keto food that I love and can interchange often for variety. I just love this way of eating. No, I don’t have pizza, baked goods or bread anymore, but what I do eat is completely satisfying and delicious. I have replaced carbs with fat for satiety and am very happy. Other people can incorporate these kinds of foods into their plan with no problem; you just have to find where you are on the spectrum. Good luck.

(Marianne) #14

No lie, pre-keto, I spent most of my time away from work in bed - probably 12 hours a day during the week and 15 or more on Sat. and Sunday, honestly. The bed was my refuge and safe place. I would just sleep to check out because I was so miserable and hopeless. This was a combination of depression, stress, low energy, and zero motivation. I have been on keto over 8 mo. That entire time, I cannot take a nap to save my life. I have so much energy! I painted the front door!!! Did major gardening projects, cut the grass today for the first time in 20 years (my husband just had rotator cuff surgery last Weds.), I’m a cleaning maniac, etc. - and I don’t get hungry!!! Loving it!!! Profoundly grateful. I don’t give a squat that I “can’t have fruit.”

#15

It’s clearly a very bad idea for some people and some people have principles against it.
I eat pretty much cakes though it’s not as much in the beginning when I needed tricks to keep my carbs low and my egg consumption high. I rarely find a good recipe do I usually make my own, I modify recipes all the time, even my own very good ones. My cakes are all heavily based on my most important food, eggs. I am bad with cookies but sponge cakes are super easy to make very low-carb and they are very eggy to begin with (mine are even eggier), nice macros, lots of nutrients, filling… I just need not to listen to the siren song of jam. But if I want fruit so bad, I often choose berries, uncooked fruits are better anyway.

But eating a lot of delicious “normal” food, I mean, fatty protein with or without added fat and vegetables to the point of becoming nicely full tend to help tremendously unless you can’t get rid of the habit of eating sweets in the end of every meal while simultanously having a dessert stomach.

If I wanted to go off sweets, I would buy a lot of pickles and make sure to respect my new rule, “pickles OR cake”. I honestly can’t imagine I would often choose cake over pickles and even my beloved chocolate would have a slim chance for long. I really love pickles. Cakes are nice but not vital. Pickles aren’t vital either but pretty close to it if you ask me :D. Maybe it helps you nothing but I often had success with having such extra rules for a while. If I am determined, I even follow them and it’s even fun (I had some “no sweeteners” days and plan to do much more. I don’t like stupid stubborn habits I got as a kid.)

If the idea of sweets just pop into your head (maybe due to habits), wait some time if you can (if you can’t, it sounds an addiction or weakness and it’s one more reason to resist temptation). If you are hungry, eat normal food. The worst thing is starting with some food that isn’t right and makes you consume lots of less than ideal food in too big quantities in a vicious circle. We don’t need carby food for that, trust me. People addicted to peanut or peanut butter probably know that (peanut is carby anyway, just not insanely carby. But pretty calorie dense and carbs can easily add up anyway).

Keto cake is a good idea if you WILL eat cake, be it keto or not. Maybe you can skip the cake but you definitely lose your sanity or sleep. Or eat zillion calories instead/later while a tiny bit of cake would solve your problem. I vote for keto cake then. In many cases, it’s hard to say what is best. And a strict person will say something totally different than me. But even I find it bad not trying to change for the better. We need to push sometimes, challenge ourselves, get rid of stubborn, strong but bad habits. So I don’t say eat anything you fancy if it fits your carb limit. You should figure out if it’s a good idea in general or in the actual case. Some people change gradually, others go cold turkey and others find cake perfectly normal food and a good option any time. We are all different.
Oh and some of us are so great at self-sabotage… Being lax might be a horrible mistake. I should be more strict myself but being too strict wouldn’t work either. It’s tricky.

#16

Wow, I don’t feel alone anymore ! You all say things I felt or have lived.

I totally relate with the safe place, or activity. Mine is biking, and it works great on the way back from work where a circadian tension craving comes to me… I am not to the point of stopping my biking to buy a piece of bread… so I arrive home safely… I need certainly to reproduce that in other activity, for sure.

Definitely I relate with the cocaine expression, I really come sometimes to the out of control point. And then a little voice tell me to wait until is comes back to reason, sometimes months, sometimes weeks. But I rather not… It’s like being in a constant Dr Jekill and Mr Hyde.

My problem is that is not my stomach that feels hungry is the brain who screams for food with all sorts of pretexts that might be bogus afterwards but powerful on the spot.

BAKING OR NOT… IT’S TRUE WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT
I come from a family of professional bakers… It’s in my blood. So yeah the best way is to forget about it… Some of you have a point about that… at least at the beginning of the keto rehab…

I concède, the presence of sweet flavours is just a slippery slope to help me forget about sugar. The close to the abyss point is soooo true for me too. Even if I can reproduce by now pretty much every one of my beloved sweet cookie in the keto version…
But maybe I have to give myself more time to really get off carb deprogram my brain… The hard thing is that I still do not relate a lot with fatty meats… I’ll try buttery treats. Do you eat cheese too… Like swiss cheese, of those super high in fat ?

Oh yes, I have an addiction where eating becomes an obsession and I need a reward for the pain of restriction… I am in the eating disorders team, and I know that there is a too fine line between the abyss by cooking or the abyss by denying… What is that cake recipe ? I think it might help… “Let us eat cake” :innocent:

So basically are you all guys familiar with relapsing and getting back on the track. Are you “veterans” in vetoing ? I started my first low carb, then keto in January 15 of last year… I fell of the track like a year after… And really struggling and finding reasons for not to go back, yet if I know that…

#17

One of the things that is best is time on plan.

but the tricks/tips we get from others sure help us while we get that time on plan for the body to heal, sugars/toxins out of our systems, hunger is satisfied truly, mental clarity kicks in big time and you come out of the mental fog and can truly think better about how and why food did effect us, etc.

Time on plan only is just that…you need time :slight_smile:

With years on plan I became a calmer person in regards to food situations. I don’t ‘desire’ things back like I did before. I look at fruit as poison. Won’t ever be touching that again in my life. So we all over time come up with tons of ways to truly change into our new eating lifestyle.

Time it all gets easier. Not perfect by any means, but a lot easier!! Where it isn’t a battle mode anymore, it is a lifestyle mode you feel very comfortable in and will remain.

(Kimbrie Sauvageau) #18

Vialis, thank you for your reply…my drinking was out of control…I never really drank to excess but would start drinking beer when I got up, all the way to work, on my lunch break, on the way home, then 1 or 2 more at home…I just hated myself, on top of that my large problem with food and serial overeating also made me feel so helpless, so powerless, like such a failure. I know I will want a beer or a cheeseburger at times and I will deal with that when the time comes but for now, I haven’t had ONE craving or twinge of desire for either. Best of luck to you

Kimbrie

#19

Oh yess. I’ll try to plan better. I just need time to do it. I’m so anxious that I need to make it become the simplest.

#20

Are you serious about the recipe? I always fear I am some savage among proper ketoers with my slight cake and huge chocolate addiction. My fav recipe was a bit more complicated as usual, had a great and somewhat mystical ingredient that I can’t buy anywhere anymore and well, it was my version of Sacher cake so some fruit was involved too and it suited simple low-carb better (I used raspberries on keto, it works and I eat fruit anyway). It was great and my only pretty cake with its chocolate top with thin almond slices and very tiny but flavorful strawberries (it’s creation and somewhat art, not just baking and eating). It’s not “proper” sponge cake (=classic recipe, very eggy, without added fat, egg whites and yolks are whipped separately… I had no idea about other types for a long time, my Mom always made this type) and perfect for the microwave oven unlike the proper ones.

Lately I use a “brownie” recipe, I just mix my homemade chocolate and egg and put some flour type stuff into it (oily seed flour and walnuts). But the best one is one egg yolk with 10g walnut and some sweetener and because it’s only yolk and not a whole egg, it needs baking powder/soda. I love simplicity, eggs, walnuts and chocolate. And cakes where I use one egg and doesn’t end up with zillion calories despite I always share my cakes with my SO (not the one egg yolk one but obviously I often make it bigger) except when I bake only for him. He’s a cake monster, I can’t compare.