Disappointed / messed up

(Malin Hallett) #1

Hi gang,

Yesterday I messed up. I’ve had a really stressful few weeks (not a excuse just an explanation) and I finished off my daughters pain au chocolate, had some cake at an event I was at and two biscuits. I am really disappointed in myself and feel utter rubbish today. I got straight back in the keto wagon after, and I started registering ketones again after about 6 hours - but today they’ve been all over the place. I would have thought they’d be straight line increasing but they increase and then drop to nil again, and have done that a few times now. I also walked nearly 20k steps yesterday and did a gym session which I had hoped would help, but doesn’t appear so.

My questions for you lovely lot:

  1. I was 4 weeks into keto - will this mistake take me back to day one from a fat adaptions perspective?
  2. My downfall is sweet treats, would you recommend cutting sweet food altogether (and I guess risking pressing the f### it button when cravings get too bad) or would you prepare keto sweet treats to have at hand or even incorporate daily until cravings for sweet stuff reduces (will it?)?

Thanks in advance and again for all your support.

#2

Not how it works, you’ll burn off the glycogen and then go back to how you were, you don’t get fat adapted overnight, you don’t lose it overnight.

Never worked for me, just makes life miserable. I like sweets, a WOE that totally removes them is punishment, not a sustainable way to eat forever. Literally eating a bowl of my chocolate protein ice cream right now. Sometimes I’ll do a chocolate chip mug cake or something.

Eat right 90% of the time, don’t worry about the 10%. Eating perfect ALL the time unless you’re a freak, is a fairy tale, and IMO, not a happy one.

(KM) #3

We’re here for you. If you never lose a pound or spend a decade figuring it out, we’re still here for you. :slightly_smiling_face:

I will say that cutting out sugar helped me not crave it, but it only works until I have some, then I’d like more, please. Example, had a macaron (Omg, auto carrot, Stop already! Not macaroon, not macaroni, and for sure not Marconi, for f’s sake! :rofl:) at a wedding shower last week, has left me thinking about how much I used to love this n that sweet treat, not a memory lane I should be walking.

We’re all different. Some people eat no sweets, some are fine with sugar substitutes, and some do eat actual sugar or fructose, with great mindfulness. Unfortunately you’ll have to do some trial and error. But you have a lifetime to figure it out, so keep on keetin’ on!

#4

I didn’t go off until fat adaptation but I have read it’s not back to day one at all, just a little bit back. Don’t worry, anyway, you can’t go back in time, don’t put mental/emotional anguish on top! Most of us do such things, deliberately or semi-accidentally… Many of us even can handle it quite well, we just go back to keto and no big harm was done. Most of us still don’t plan to eat sugary stuff once in a while forever but it may be harder to be totally committed from the very beginning… And some of us don’t want to do that ever but falling back to some pretty healthy low-carb is still going off.

IDK what would be better for you, forgetting about sweet things or not. Or maybe you should just eat dessert every day like I do (actually sometimes I skip a day now… weird) - that may or may not involve sweetness. I do understand the NEED for that as I have that. Maybe 1-2 decades with carnivore-ish as my default woe will change it and I only will enjoy my desserts without strictly needing it but I am fine with what I have regarding that.
So, I can’t help you here, some people can and are willing to give up sweets while others can’t and/or unable to do so. And sweets may mess up things or may be just perfect while without them things go south. It’s highly individual. If you CAN easily enough give sweets up, it does sounds a good idea.

By the way, my inevitable need for sweets at the end of meals stopped when I started to avoid plant carbs. So sometimes it’s not THAT individual or habitual, it’s just your diet and the carbs messing with you. But many people find sweeteners mess with them too. I never noticed that but I do prefer eating normal food, not sweeteners. I totally allow them if I want something sweet, I just almost never want it and it’s totally due to my food choices…

But when I was a newbie, I ate even normal sweets on keto (I mean, chocolate covered banana, still nothing overly processed or particularly sugary, it was like 3g carbs and a very satisfying portion :smiley: I have a talent there I suppose… no sweetener or anything as it had sugar. maybe a tiny sweetener in the beginning but it quickly changed).
If you are even remotely like me, you WON’T make things hard for you. It never works for me. I don’t even need to make things feeling not comfy. I restrict myself too much and I feel it’s cool until it doesn’t. But training, that is useful. Things not always go to the right direction without a tiny push, experimental stricter days, no commitment for that strict style, just trying it out… Pushing only as much as feels okay… I am in a race with myself. And only myself. I weaned myself off from sweet drinks that way, tiny push all the time, using less and less sweetener. I dislike sweet drinks since years. But it was important for me, minimizing sweeteners. If may be fine and dandy for someone else to eat keto sweets all the time, maybe not all the time but every day…? IDK, I follow my own way.

Best wishes and don’t worry, KCKO! :smiley: You seem to do okay except the slip. I can respect that as I felt it’s not trivial many times, putting in effort every day even if it’s not hard but still, there are some restrictions and we follow it day to day for a long while… That’s not a little thing. Some people couldn’t do a DAY. I don’t say you should be pleased with not taking it seriously, definitely not that! Just appreciate a bit when you do a lot even if slip a bit here and there in weaker moments.

(KM) #5

:heart:

(Alec) #6

Mal

  1. Don’t worry, everyone messes up from time to time. No biggie. The more experience you gain doing keto the easier it will be to know how to handle situations with temptations. One strategy I have used successfully is to eat well (on keto foods of course) before you go to any event that may present temptations. If you are already satiated it is MUCH less likely you will succumb to temptation.
  2. You will get back to fat burning as soon as you chew through the carbs you consumed, probably already happened. You are most certainly not starting again. Just get back to it, as you already have.
  3. Don’t worry about ketone levels, they can go up and down. Just focus on keeping carbs as low as possible.
  4. My recommendation on sweets when you start is to make your own keto sweet treats with sweetener and eat them when you feel you need a sweet treat (hopefully not too often!). But, the trick here is to wean yourself off sweet if you can. You can do this by making your sweet treats less sweet over time, or make your sweet treat occasions fewer and fewer as time goes on. I used to make quite a few keto sweet treats, but I don’t eat them any more. My desire for sweet has gone, I don’t crave that taste any more, I prefer rich fatty savoury!

Good luck, hope you continue to go well!
Cheers
Alec

(Robin) #7

Hang in there. We all have our weaknesses and have fallen off the wagon… for one meal, one day, a year… whatever. Yours was not catastrophic and you’re already back in the groove.

Do you think this might be easier for you emotionally, if you weren’t checking your ketones? I ask because early on, I found the scales to be my biggest challenge mentally. I finally walked away from measuring, as I knew I was already doing everything I could.

Some people enjoy measuring and tracking and it helps motivate them. Others like me can get derailed and lose hope when numbers jump.

Either way, you got this!

(KM) #8

:heart:

The older I get the more I know this is true. Intense scorekeeping probably won’t change my behavior very much, it just gives me unrealistic pride or despair, or makes me furious with some mystery element that’s not going right when I’m doing what I can, which is a hard way to get through a day. I do like to assess monthly progress, I’m usually pleasantly surprised with the changes patience brings over time.

(Geoffrey) #9

Forget the mistake but remember the lesson.
You are just fine and you’ll quickly be back in ketosis as long as you stay true to your diet from here on out.
When it comes to avoiding sweets everyone is different. Some people have a very strong commitment to improving their health and won’t allow anything to get in their way. Others allow their weaknesses to take over sometimes but get right back on that horse with little difficulty and sometimes that works for them and sometimes it results in their downfall. You just need to decide how committed you are and how much you can handle.
I made that decision when I started my carnivore journey. I jumped in with both feet cold turkey. It took about two weeks for the cravings to start subsiding and about thirty days before I was completely over all sweets. They no longer have any appeal to me anymore. I could no more eat something sweet now as I could a horse apple. :racehorse::poop:
I made a commitment to my health and diet. I will not fail. In doing so I have not cheated in 411 days now and don’t see any reason why I would at this point especially when I’ve healed so many things in my body.
Now get back on track and try to stay committed to your health.
Good luck and good health.

(Malin Hallett) #10

Thank you, your response makes me feel less guilty and I also think your approach to sweet stuff may be what I will have to do too.

(Malin Hallett) #11

Haha hope you enjoyed the macaroni :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

Thank you so much, you’re right, I’ll just have to find what works for me by experimenting!

(Malin Hallett) #12

Thank you, I definitely cannot give up sweets easily - so I think I shall get my baking hat on for now and make some keto treats to keep at hand! :blush:

(Malin Hallett) #13

I have made such a huge change to my eating habits and tracking helps me at this stage feel like I’m on track. It wasn’t a reason for my slip, it was emotional eating at its best. I did get to a stage where I wasn’t checking ketones very often as I knew they’d show ketosis - so once I’m there again I’ll start weaning off. I would like to get to a place where in not tracking of weighing but for now it actually motivates me. To stop counting calories and logging food has been super liberating!

(Malin Hallett) #14

Thank you, this is all great advice and also makes me feel like I can do this! I was really enjoying my keto journey until this slip, which see sled to come out of nowhere but of course I hindsight it was building up. I just need to make sure I have better options on hand the next time!

#15

Oh, baking? That’s fun too but I have found it more difficult than just doing some quick sweets :slight_smile: I have sooo many recipes and I so don’t use them as they aren’t carnivore :smiley: But I talked about desserts being important for me, not sweets. So I just eat a spoonful of sour cream sometimes and if it’s not decadent or dessert-like, I can make whipped cream. I do that a lot. Of course, it matters a lot what I desire but usually it’s just “something dessert-like” or "something different than meat and eggs (eggs can be involved but with something else, it’s usually some dairy item, it’s hard to beat that combo when it comes to sweets and desserts if you ask me).

To me, making new recipes and realizing them is a rewarding hobby. One shouldn’t overdo it, not even mentally, certain things just won’t happen so too much determination can be very time consuming and disappointing (though one may make something very different but still great…). I like that I am not FORCED to make something all the time anymore. It’s for the days when I am into the work. Baking gives me joy even if I don’t eat the result and it helps to stick to my woe better (I am still bad at it but it’s not my goal to be super good anyway. just not going far enough for my body to give warning signs. I do avoid certain things out of health consciousness even on my off days). So I don’t consider baking a treat something that one does when they are weak or doing it temporarily, no, it can be a nice part of a very health-conscious life. Nothing can stop my baking, I have some carnivore recipes too. And tons of keto ones from old days, I only use a handful, some not even for myself.
There are very simple keto treats, no need to overcomplicate things :slight_smile: (My fav cake - not like I eat it often since I tried carnivore… but it is very good - takes 2-3 minutes in total. Unless I need to break the walnuts first, then it is 4-5? Just a guess, I am not good with time but nuking time is 30 sec.)

I try to stop myself, I get excited when I find a nice topic :slight_smile:

It may be even your emotional eating will shift to having some nice keto food. I don’t think I have an emotional eating problem but I had other, vaguely similar ones and as time passed and I made great low-carb/keto/carnivore recipes and my tastes and habits changed, I lost very much of my desire towards carbier options. It’s good because when I am unwell and I just DON’T CARE… Then even my health-consciousness can’t me keep back enough. There are some things I still won’t touch but the rest can be bad enough especially in big amounts. Some part of me get released from most of the rules and jump the chances… That’s why it’s good I strongly prefer my normal food. It’s just the best so why would I eat something subpar when I need as much joy as I can have in a miserable time? It’s NOT perfect, I still have my weaknesses and I need something else there but not eating most of my old problem items? That’s easy as they lost their charm.
But it takes time. And reading about other people’s experiences on forums since many years, apparently some unlucky souls never gets there. They just control themselves most or all of the time. But very many of us love our food on keto. (I do go off but there are other reasons for that. I used to love my off days, now they are not nearly as enjoyable as my days very close to carnivore. I am evolving :smiley: It’s a fun journey.)

That’s VERY important. I cook and bake for my SO, I visit a relative sometimes… I know these in advance so I can plan ahead. Sudden desires are trickier. If you have some nice treat at hand all the time, it may be a too big temptation. Maybe not for you but I know this is still my problem. I never left desserts, that wasn’t my thing. Whenever I baked something, it disappeared almost immediately (okay, I never baked something big - because I didn’t want to see how far I can go if I do… making small things is a good attitude for someone like me. sometimes you can train yourself - and sometimes it’s better not to risk it). So know yourself and act accordingly :slight_smile:
Sometimes a need for some fun treat is drastically diminished by just eating normal food. It’s always a good idea for me to get satiated with that first and let’s see if I want something else. Maybe I do but the amount probably will be tiny. Don’t trust your hungry mind too much, it can have stupid ideas. When hungry, eat proper food in proper amounts! (Though maybe there are exceptions…? Yes. My SO tends to eat dessert for breakfast. I always wanted proper food - okay, cake is proper food for him too… - when hungry even if my mind randomly picked food ideas from memory cells for some odd reason. If the food is right before me, that can be trickier. So grab the good food asap! Not like the dessert isn’t good but well, not suitable for a meal, may form bad habits… I wouldn’t want to eat desserts left or right, no matter how wonderful, nutritious and healthy. But I understand if that is the way for someone else.)

(Marianne) #16

Fabulous; I really like that.

Me, too. I could eat a brick of cream cheese or juicy steak and be completely happy.

I like the suggestion to eat before you go to a function. In addition, eat when you are there. I’ve found there are always low carb choices to have - they usually have a cheese/meat/veggie tray to have, then if buffet, I stick to the protein only. While others may be having the pasta and potato choices, I take 2-3 pieces of meat only. It’s satisfying.

As for the sugar/dessert, it was interesting to read everyone’s comments above. You will need to figure out where you fall. For me, I cannot indulge “a little.” Sounds dramatic, but that first bite takes away all control and usually leads to a binge. Sweets are addictive to me; they are just too delicious and I don’t have the control to have one or two of anything in that category. My strategy is that I just don’t have them and staying away and eating clean has removed my compulsion to have them. I have all the power until the first bite. (And the mind game that results from binging is mentally crushing.) Everyone is different. You have to find out what you can/cannot accommodate.

Thanks for sharing!

(KCKO, KCFO 🥥) #17

I would suggest fat bombs as treats early on. Baked goodies, even keto ones still are not my friends. Oh I can have some from time to time. but fat bombs helped me the most. I am almost 8 yrs in now and staying away from baked goods still serves me well.

I use fat bombs made with 100% chocolate powder (25 grams), melted coconut oil (125 grams) Swerve to taste (I only add a tiny amount as I do not like overly sweet tasting things, the recipe I tried originally called for 1/4 cup, I use way less than that.) I use molds from Amazon, I put nuts or frozen berries in them for some variety. Easy, quick, and freezes in about an hr. They have really helped me out over the years.

#18

100% Correct. Yet people still focus only on their bad 10%. Focus on being 90% great.

(Geoffrey) #19

You are not alone. I’m the same way. My wife is a moderator. She can have just a little of something and be good with it but I’m not. I’m an abstainer. I must stay away things I know I have little control over.
It’s what has kept me from not cheating.

#20

Meanwhile many of us are some mix :smiley: And it can change anyway. I started from virtually overeating anything and everything (except meat but it’s easy when one simply doesn’t eat meat. now I can overeat meat too but it’s easy to avoid) and trained myself to be very content with tiny amounts of many stuff - but I still have a few items where I can’t easily stop. Even if I can eat tiny of something, zero is often a way better idea. Tiny is for the times when it’s more hedonistic or even realistic to eat tiny than none.
In some cases I needed carnivore to break an addiction and I never went back to eating a lot of peanuts, for example, not even on my off days. I can eat 0.5g but 5g feels a very generous amount. And it is, I should eat zero… Sometimes we can do tiny but zero is the right thing to do. Unless we are tempted as denying temptation would cause serious mental anguish in me, I suppose, if I would have the personality to do it.
And sometimes tiny is possible - but zero is easier and why to waste our tiny control on unnecessary things when we can just avoid the whole thing? This is almost an abstrainer thing: saying no is less effort than saying no after a bite - even though it’s possible to stop after a bite too. But it has a bigger strain and these strains add up. It quickly can wear me down (saying no before the first bite too often does the same so I need my moderation skills too when the small temptation is insistent. if it’s a big temptation, I have no chance to begin with). I should choose my battles. So I often let in mostly harmless and more desired things to be able to avoid something worse. What I consider a bad idea when one whop actually aims to be stricter allows the mostly harmless but not quite right items without conditions. It may just keep them in our life, never disappearing, potentially the amount or frequency may rise, carb creeping may happen… I like to softly train myself. If I really want something, fine, let’s have a little, just enough (if it’s an item where I can do moderation but almost everything is like that at this point) - and hope it won’t happen soon again as regular tiny extras may make me slip… But if I can go without, let’s do that. This way I hopefully go into the direction I want (if my desires/tastes let me but they are surprisingly malleable. not very much but more than I have thought) without being too hard on myself (that would never work anyway). And that’s how I lost many not so good items without trying too hard. Just doing the above stubbornly, for many years (when I behaved. I went wild many times too but the usual, more behaving days formed my habits and tastes more).

We should know ourselves (at least eventually… it’s understandable it’s not so clear in the beginning especially if we do something very new) and act accordingly. Different things work well for different people. Not eating sweets may be a great idea for many but it would just make some people quit or be miserable (it’s sad if quitting makes one miserable too). Sweets may be a daily crutch for a while. Or an occasional helper/source of joy. Or maybe sweets all the time is someone’s sweet spot and part of their perfect diet, who knows? No matter how it sounds for others :upside_down_face: And I am pretty sure I always will love sweet things and never will even entertain the idea to try to give them up :slight_smile: I just am also certain I will eat very little truly sweet things in the not very near, not very distant future. That is my direction. But I don’t give them up, just let them mostly disappear. I often realized that something just isn’t with me anymore as I lost interest at some point. (I always will eat subtly sweet things because you can pry whipping cream from of my cold, dead hands. And there is liver too. Actually, I am not SURE I will always have cream but it gives me so much joy and so many great desserts I can’t imagine that. Why would I ever give up that highly enjoyable wonder? Tasting sweet does nothing bad to me, just good. I think.)