CRAB funny ad

(Barbara M) #1

Heard a funny ad on a music channel.

Guy at restaurant to server: This isn’t Crab, I ordered the crab.

Server: Well sure it is, it’s Corn, Rice and Broccoli. It’s vegan CRAB.

… I’d be so sad if it wasn’t real crab served.

(Edith) #2

I just saw vegan hard-boiled eggs this past weekend. :nauseated_face:

(Central Florida Bob ) #3

I almost threw up in my mouth a little at that.

#4

Oh my, that’s not even a dish with a proper amino acid profile as far as I know… Or anything resembling a dish someone would want to eat…
But yes, it could be a wonderful vegan dish (there are so many of them), it can’t replace crab. (I am not sure I ever ate crab but I am sure about this.)

My condolences. I saw that (online, not irl) years ago. Wow. They have some “ham” in net for Easter too…
I am fine with the weird things of vegans (well not but kinda accept most*) AS LONG AS they don’t put a thin, tiny, almost background colored font “just like” before some dairy name or something similar. I hate that. I am experienced and look at things carefully but it’s still a nasty underhanded method to fool people.

*NOT the 0% fat not-cheese. It’s insane. Plant non-cheese, fine but put fat into it! Fat-phobic imitations(? not even that, maybe visually if we look at it from far?) of fatty items (and the same with protein) are the worst. Interestingly, if I replace carbs with fat and/or protein, that often works, see my very new biscuit success. (After decades, I have finally learned to bake tasty biscuits with a great texture! And they are pretty good carb and nutrition wise too! Well a bit fatty but they are biscuits, I can’t help it.)

(Barbara M) #5

What could possibly be a vegan egg? I’ve heard of using flaxseed as a baking sub.

I’ll stick with the real thing.

(Barbara M) #6

Well this Internet blog says: The yolk part was the easiest, since I had half of the job ready after developing the recipe for a perfect fatty vegan egg yolk, which is also the main ingredient of my vegan carbonara!

It has the perfect eggy taste and the perfect oily fatty texture of a runny yolk.

The egg whites were the hardest part. They required many attempts, wasted resources and waste of energy over a course of many weeks. In the end I opted for a recipe with very few but irreplaceable ingredients.

And potato flakes, carrageen, silken tofu among other things.
Impressive that this blogger perfected her hard boiled egg, while the real perfect egg exists.

You’ve expanded my knowledge, and something I didn’t need to know.:grinning:

(Edith) #7

Plus, I would consider these Frankenfoods.

#8

There are zillion egg replacements especially in baking where they sometimes just replace a very tiny facet, ignoring everything else (not like taste is replaceable… by the way I have black salt I never use :smiley: it doesn’t remind me of eggs personally but I am an egg maniac and egg is completely irreplaceable to me. even in baking, my baking extremely heavily depends on the fat, protein and flavor of eggs and the last one is too unique. I can replace dairy somehow in rare cases but eggs? :smiley: impossible).

I almost never tried to replace eggs (happened a few times), I usually try to replace anything and everything with eggs :smiley: Like flour, that’s tricky as I won’t buy egg powder…

@Hockeylady: Now after reading this, I must go and google what was used… I am very sure it sucks but still… I am too curious.
Interesting, I would think that the almost tasteless egg white is easier than the only thing in existence that has yolk taste :smiley:

I really hate tofu (the reason I stopped eating miso once in a few years… pity, miso is great, my SO says I should use mushroom instead of tofu… hmmmm) but maybe some are tasteless with a smooth texture… But egg white is nice, not fully tasteless… Tough.
Potato flakes are tasty, I gave up on finding something like this (it was potato flour in my case) many years ago, it was a lot of effort to get some for a high price. And when my webshop times arrived, it just wasn’t important anymore.

Making a different version of a food can be fun, it’s part of my recipe making hobby, it’s useful when I am low on something too… But it can bring lots of disappointment if one expects too much (must depends on the “sensitivity”. I feel the different flavors and textures of items so a good substitution - when we want the flavor too. I usually do - is almost never possible when the item to substitute has a unique flavor. flour is easy to substitute as it is tasteless and the result is very often better. potato is no way).

(Doug) #9

Oh good grief… :smirk::roll_eyes::smile:

(Barbara M) #10

@Shinita, here’s a link for what blog recipe I was referencing.


Seems like a lot of work, but recipe bloggers can be very creative.

I’ve never been a fan of tofu so I’m sticking with real eggs.

(KM) #11

“oily fatty texture” of egg yolks? Ergh. I think this person’s been a vegan waaaay too long if that’s how they remember egg yolks! :nauseated_face:

#12

Thanks. After my comment I forgot to google… :sweat_smile:

Seems like a lot of work

Yeah, those things aren’t for me. I mean, sometimes I gladly watch someone doing it online but
putting unnecessarily much effort into some food? :smiley: Nope. Making food (especially developing new recipes) is a hobby of mine but I still don’t want to put extreme effort into anything or much effort into it regularly. I was a lazy one. And then came carnivore and spoiled me. I don’t even need recipes there, just toss something into a pan. I make other things but it’s just my hobby here and there and even those aren’t too much work.

Oh the looks is kinda okay, it’s obviously not egg but close enough :smiley:

I dislike tofu and can’t get potato flakes and anyway, the white is the less exciting part. Oh black salt, I have some so I will try to yolk thing. JUST to be able to say it has nothing to do with the taste of yolks. As it’s obviously the truth but 1. it will be better to actually try 2. maybe it’s borderline edible, who knows? I have lots of “imitation” recipes where it’s obviously nothing like the original but I like it. My SO still loves a dessert where I replace quark with millet (yeah, they are nothing alike but still, it works :D). Quark is special as it’s animal item and still super easy to replace it (usually with coconut and lemon in cooking and faux quark from egg white and lemon is a huge thing in Hungarian paleo cuisine).

I appreciate that the yolk replacement actually have fat :smiley: That’s how one does things, not making “vegan bacon” from rice paper or something (yes there was fat there but not much and the protein was replaced by rice paper… :D).

Vegans are quite amusing sometimes. All those desperate and ridiculous attempts… I have no problem with the okay ones. Seitan is a super tasty protein thing (if one does it right as I do and one fancies it at the moment. it gets boring way quicker and for way longer than meat) so I get that. It reminds me of bread the most when I use my air fryer. No matter how I cook or fry it, it never even remotely resembles meat, unsurprisingly. It just can’t deny it’s from grains, no matter how low-carb it is.

But I get carried away just like last time… As the forum isn’t very active nowadays (at least not the topics suitable for an outlet for me), I am thinking finally making my own thread. We will see.

(Barbara M) #13

So, I think possibly that we have been amused by the music channel commercial ad.

I enjoy meat and seafood and real food and never was interested in or convinced to try the vegan lifestyle.

#14

I enjoyed animal and plant-based food alike (and the great dishes mixing the two groups and more) but the former is more beneficial for my body is well-being so if I need to choose, it’s that :slight_smile: I was interested in veganism but never actually wanted to do it. it’s just interesting to see if one can get proper nutrition there and which and how… Oh and raw vegan cuisine is cute. (Still can’t comprehend how anyone can get satiated by such meals. I mostly used them as a way to eat little vegs on keto as much vegs couldn’t fit even into my generous, 40g net carbs limit and I really missed vegs on keto sometimes. And my stupid cats loved the raw vegan nonmeatballs, IDK how to call them. Well they were very tasty. And not satiating at all… Vegan keto blogger said oh, it was enough for her family for multiple meals. I ate it all and it was a cute appetizer. But I think we all saw things like “oh one of these low-carb, low-fat, low-cal, low-everything magical thin pancake made my hard physical worker husband full” I suppose. I am kinda curious what is the reality because clearly not even remotely that. Maybe the pancakes were bad tasting, I lost hunger in the presence of not tasty food before too… :D)

By the way, I totally make the vegan fake yolk today :smiley: Hopefully my SO will be able to eat it somehow, it has okay ingredients for him (not like I couldn’t handle 1g starch or something). I don’t have nutritional yeast but I had it before so I know it tastes mostly yeast anyway. Definitely NOT cheesy the slightest but well, I eat cheese and know its taste (many cheeses exist but the yeast doesn’t resembles any I have ever tried). It’s good on fried cucchini slices, I used it up that way when I had some several years ago. It’s super expensive now (and the bag is big), I rather buy beef with that money… Hell, I rather buy honey with that money and that is a dangerous and not healthy item! But super tasty at least.

(Barbara M) #15

I guess I’m in the camp to eat food that your ancestors would recognize. Not that they didn’t grind things to use as ingredients, and also hearing that the body’s absorption of nutrients is more efficient from animal products. I state that based on other’s podcasts and video creators. I haven’t conducted any research. I do believe I feel better with a simpler food plan. Scrambled eggs with butter and cheese for a super quick and easy meal.

I’m all for trying different recipes for fun at times. And have settled on less complex meal planning which takes less shopping, ingredients and kitchen time.

I like eggs, so trying to replace them buying an egg mold to use to pour the tofu, potato flakes, carageen like mixture… Nah.

(Barbara M) #16

@Shinita. And not satiating at all… Vegan keto blogger said oh, it was enough for her family for multiple meals. I ate it all and it was a cute appetizer.

That reminded me of a conversation I think Carl may have had at some point in time with Dr Ted Naiman about eating. If I remember correctly, Carl was at an event that wasn’t carb friendly. He (or someone in the story) mentioned eating a lot of cauliflower, I mean Alot, and still wasn’t satisfied. Dr Naiman said it could have been the lack of protein and the satiety signals never kicked in, despite the amount of cauliflower eaten.

So, the body is so complex that is seems pretty tolerant of a wide variety of diets. Here’s hoping the next time you order crab, that its the version you wanted. :joy:

#17

Of course not. 1kg cauliflower (the minimum amount I was able to eat after I discovered fried riced cauliflower - it was on keto and I immediately had to ban it) is nothing, it’s just a little veg like a salad without proper ingredients (I mean cheese and whatnot :slight_smile: ). 2-3 kg still couldn’t do much beyond filling my stomach and leaving me super hungry (it’s a bad combo)…
Okay, some people are fine with carbs for satiation, my SO is one such person (he just needs ~1000 kcal at once for a main meal so a mostly veggie salad still wouldn’t cut it) and there must be a reason “hungry? eat an apple” had to come from (an apple is a sure way to make my SO starved. I had the same in the days when I still ate an apple out of the blue)… But for us normal people, protein is probably needed for satiation. In my case, a lot. Scrambled eggs keep me hungry (or make me if I was satiated before and I had no food that day) unless I put a lot of fatty red meat into it. It’s possible that 12-20 eggs would be fine even when I am actually hungry already (a bit easier when I am not) but even I don’t eat that many.

Well I made the thing! The runny yolk version. It’s not bad… If one can get over the sulfuric taste of black salt… I have found out I dislike black salt, the sulfuric taste is off-putting… But when it got cold (we already had dinner when I made it so no one was interested), it was a bit better. Interesting thing, it doesn’t resembles anything (except the looks, it’s very yolky! I used turmeric for the color, the recipe said it may change the flavor, good, I said as the other ingredients has almost none and I like turmeric. golden milk is one of my fav drink! kind of a soup. I only like the savory kind and almost always put eggs into it, being me and not wanting to use a lot of milk. it still needs milk but less). It’s edible I guess? It’s pointless to me but it was almost no effort and I am way too curious.
Big minus: it’s some watery, oily, spiced starch so basically no protein. I dislike when an imitation ruins the macro content of the original - though this thing is just to spice up vegan life, not providing protein so maybe it’s okay for them. Anyway, it’s very easy to eat lots of protein on a plant-based diet - as long as one likes the diet. I would get bored of it in no time. Amazing variety - but not the right items for me.

I do love look at professionally made vegan dishes, they look great! So it’s a bit like looking at paintings or flowers to me. The ingredients together are rarely tempting, I need the less showy but super tasty traditional dishes from my childhood for that.
Corn, Rice and Broccoli is the blandest miserable pitiful thing with bad nutrition I can imagine at the moment. It’s just a bunch of plain carby side dishes.

(Barbara M) #18

@Shinita
I’m tickled that you make the yolk. It’s so interesting that you and SO are so different in satiety.

So you added it to make a yolky drink?

#19

I didn’t made a drink, I just made the runny yolk recipe. We don’t have bread with go with it though. Sometimes we have such days, even my SO doesn’t need bread every day, I only bake bread once a week (just like my anchestors but it lasted for a week for them).
And today we tasted it (well I did it yesterday but it was really just a lick or two).
My SO is rarely this expressive :smiley: He made many grimaces, he had no words first but then I pointed out that it’s technically edible and he acquienced and said he had worse tasting things in his mouth in his life. And that this thing and yolks have something in common even regarding flavor but it’s not what he loves yolks for. I agree. It clearly has no egg taste. As it’s not an egg. Items with a unique flavor are pretty impossible to imitate. Eggs, pork, potato, flavorful cheese… Nothing else is like them. Sour cream is like that too. Or pickles :slight_smile: Most vegs and fruits, actually… And then people go and make APPLE filling from biscuits (it’s a wartime thing if I know correctly)… No way it would work for me. Lemon juice goes a long way but well, it has lemon flavor, NOT apple.
I made a third of the recipe (using 9g oil), it’s a full small glass and I have no idea how we will eat it up. But we will figure out. I had some with my meatballs as they lacked fat this time (IDK why as I used much fatty pork skin. and super lean pork as usual, it’s the best thing I can do with super lean pork)…

Hm, drinks… I can put it into a drink I suppose… Though I never put fat into any of my drinks except some of my soups (it’s a drink when I make only a mugfull and no cooking is involved, just hot water :slight_smile: ). But a little fat can’t ruin them. It has turmeric so it should be fine with golden milk. I may or may not add an egg but it’s probably good if I do, I like my drinks having protein.

I can pretty much promise I won’t experiment with such silly thing again, for some years at least… It’s much better to bake something nice and low-carb, my recipes got pretty good in the last months.