There’s no 100% correct way to handle this but I’ve been very honest with my own four-year-old daughter about why I eat this way, how I ended up where I was, and what happens to me if I do anything different. For example, she knows I don’t eat many carbs so if I take her out to a fast food place and I happen to eat something, she knows why I’ve not got any bread or fries, etc. Sometimes, being sweet, she’ll offer me something like a few of her fries then she’ll say, “Oh daddy, I forgot, you don’t eat too many carbs, no problem!”
She eats a typical diet and is a bright and healthy four-year-old. She gets treats every now and again but I avoid things that are overwhelmingly bad. A key thing has been keeping a disconnect between “good news” and “here you can have some candy” etc, and instead celebrating in other ways such as taking her swimming, or watching a favourite movie. I’m obviously not a troll and keep candy/chocolate/etc away from her and do occasionally reward her with something like that when she’s been great or done something well, but not to the point that any habits are forming or mental connections. I think that’s part of what I grew up with and it took me going full blown keto to realize that and stop rewarding myself (or supporting myself during bad times) with food.
She knows I have type 2 diabetes as well (as do most teachers at her preschool by now, haha, thanks for telling everyone). I am not ashamed of it though because I consider things to be going well on keto (recent HbA1c of 4.8) and would prefer she is fully aware so she can grow up with this in the back of her mind. As she gets older and more independent I may have to parent more in this area but I don’t want to get to the point of restricting things so much that she’s treated differently by peers, or she feels she needs to sneak around me and gets some sort of weird eating disorder. From my point of view it’s all just about sharing information, being open and transparent, giving choices, and demonstrating consequences.
Oh, I forgot one last thing. When I do cook for us, I lean the meal towards the keto side of things so that she never thinks of it as weird or “daddy’s food”. For example, the other day I cooked us up some delicious chicken thighs with some vegetables on the side, and she was very satisfied with the meal. Sometimes she just wants carbs, so I’ll add a small portion of pasta or something similar.
