Accountability for a Solo Sister (Lonely Lady)

(Stephanie Sablich) #1

Hi, new friends (I hope),

I am just getting serious about keto after flirting with it for quite some time. I’ve been flirting with IF for some time (mostly 16/8 or 20/4 or 22/2… it changes) and I’m ready to get real with everything. I’m 29 years old and quite active for my size, which is a big 16/small 18. I am hovering around 215 lbs on any given day. Crazy insulin resistance.

My biggest issue… self-control, especially when I’m by myself. I just moved to Michigan after years of teaching in Chicago, leaving my social support network behind. I started an intense (full-time, accelerated) graduate school program in an emotionally difficult field, and have to work nearly full-time hours to (kind of) pay the bills. Annnnnd my mom has a few degenerative health conditions that will leave her wheelchair-bound and blind, and she was just diagnosed with breast cancer and is undergoing treatment for that. All in about 2.5 months. So, life is stressful right now. A season of stress. It’s not overwhelming yet, I’m not “in over my head…” the water is right at my head, I’d say.

How do I deal with stress, you ask? Three things have worked in the past: eating carbs and sugar, getting out into nature, and reading/writing for pleasure. My current lifestyle (school and family obligations) only allow for one of these three coping mechanisms… guess which one I use? I KNOW that I’ve got to change my food perspective, my way of eating… but I cannot even describe the cravings that happen at the end of a long and stressful day and with a gorgeous grocery and Qdoba across the street (damn you, Qdoba 3-cheese nachos with chips on the side!) And right now in my life, something’s got to give. Usually, it’s the diet.

I’m not so much looking for advice (though I’d accept any that is offered) as I am looking for support… and affirmation of my plan: when I have a craving that feels intense, overwhelming… I will spend at least 20 minutes on this site. I will post that I’m desperate to cheat, and I will read through success stories. I will (hopefully) be surrounded with supportive folks and remember my goals. Because trying to do this alone is just not working out so well.

#2

Hi! Welcome to the family. You’ll find tons of support here. Where in Michigan are you? My wife and I are in Grand Rapids.

(Stephanie Sablich) #3

Thanks so much for reaching out! Precisely what I’m hoping to find here :slight_smile: I’m in Ann Arbor, at U-M.

#4

State fan here…but we can still be friends, right? :smile:

Some advice: Don’t hesitate to reach out with questions, comments, concerns, musings, humor, fears…the folks here are great.

#5

I did things a little backward. I had been doing moderate carb awhile (no white flour or gluten) but would cheat a lot. I discovered Dr. Fung and IF so I started fasting, 23 hours, 36, and longer. What that helped was to reduce my urge to snack. Compared to eating nothing, eating mostly fat was ok. One of the goals is to lower insulin which is stimulated by eating, the fewer times you eat, even a little, the better

I drank water, salt and had one coffee a day with HWC a very small amount. People advocate against this because you are not fat adapted so fasting is harder but I found it easier. Then I eventually went keto

(Stephanie Sablich) #6

I think we can work it out :slight_smile: I was always a State fan growing up, and I’m… well… SLOWLY adjusting to being a Wolverine.

Thanks for the advice- just lurking on the boards has given me confidence in this community. I’ll be sure to engage more in the future.

(Stephanie Sablich) #7

That’s a really good way of thinking about it. I’ve done a few extended day fasts; my longest was about 94 hours. I actually find fasting to be incredibly easy with my busy schedule, so I will keep that tool at the top of my box. I like the perspective you provided though; that’s really helpful!

(Susan) #8

@ssablich – That’s a great plan! When I started in June I was quite carb- addicted, but spent a lot of time here reading others posts and learning all I could. Within 2 weeks I had lost my taste for most carbs (which is almost miraculous, considering in May I had eaten an entire large bag of miniature Reese’s peanut butter cups in two days time). Began trading a bite of butter or some nuts for candy or other carbs and found that did curb my hunger. Within 4 weeks bread & croutons no longer held great appeal (sorry Panera) and a habit of stopping at Dunkin Donuts or Taco Bell for a treat after walking my dog - I know, I know!- had been broken. Recently got some waffle fries at Chick-Fil-A - I blame PMS - and didn’t finish them…they tasted just sort of blah. And the best thing about KCKO is that it actually does make you calmer and more focused. It did take me a while to experience the energy that people talk about, not sure if that was a factor of needing to lose a lot of weight (120 pounds) or not. But within 8 weeks finally started feeling better if I remember correctly.

This was just a long way of saying “You can do this!” :slight_smile:

(Keto Travels) #9

Something I found and continue to find really helpful to „keep me company“ are podcasts like the 2 keto dudes. I can listen to that while doing the dishes or traveling or going shopping, and a real human voice helps a lot sometimes drive home the point that I am not alone in this endeavour.

And yes, the forum is a great „treat“ too!

(You've tried everything else; why not try bacon?) #10

What kind of amateur takes two whole days to eat one measly little bag? :grin:

Welcome, @ssablich, and thanks for posting. I can identify with a lot of your story, being a sugar addict myself. I find that eating low-carb, high-fat satisfies my hunger much more than sugar-burning ever did, but I still get carb cravings. Fortunately, I’ve been sober for a number of years, and sugar cravings are susceptible to the same techniques that got me through early sobriety. The trick is basically not to tell myself that I’ve quit for ever; just to postpone the next carb till later. Usually, when later comes, I’m fine. If you keep calm and keto on, things will get a lot better—promise!

As @KetoSue says, “You can do this!” Here’s some virtual :bacon: to encourage you.

(Jessica) #11

Welcome! I found having my keto go-tos for comfort food: mashed cauliflower, fathead pizza, noodle-less lasagna…really helped getting rid of the comfort aspect of carbs. And I would eat SF pudding which isn’t the best, but it helped me.

(Rachel) #12

I love that eating high fat curbs my cravings. Although I occasionally struggle with emotional desire to eat. I find that when I don’t get enough sleep my thoughts of eating for comfort are magnified. It’s really learning to listen to my body and it’s various needs. Especially in your situation when you have many obligations and responsibilities the importance of taking care of yourself is vital. I find that early morning at the gym getting in at least 20 min of cardio is ideal “me” time. It helps when I do so while still fasted. A wake up shower and black coffee helps get me out the door. I’ve discovered this routine improves my focus and motivation for the day. It supplies me with more energy and improved mood.
So in conclusion to my summary of encouragement and of what works throughout my journeys:

  1. Put you first, early in the day
  2. Design the ultimate environment for solid sleep
  3. Aim to get your heart rate up at least once a day with ten min minimum activity.
  4. Eat enough fat so you don’t want to snack
  5. Stay hydrated to ensure you’re flushing your system out with the blah
  6. Eat your spinach any way you can :slight_smile:
  7. Delegate when possible and get local support to assist with your loved one
    I was a PCA for my grandparents over 7 years ( while being a wife and Mom of 3) and I treasure every memory. Exercise (cardio and eventually strength training) (my butt moving music time) first thing (everyday except Sunday) is what kept me smiling. Thanks for the opportunity to share.
    It’s encouraging to me to hear your story. Relating my experience bolsters me to keep on keeping on. Take care :slight_smile:
#13

Welcome to the forums,

You will find lots of support here and you can be sure that you have not traveled this road alone. Many of us have had and still struggle at times with the same emotional and stress triggers for “hunger” and the carb addiction is real. Don’t beat yourself up, and just take each moment as it comes.

Slow and steady, stumble…get back up and look ahead. You can do this, and here, you will find the supportive crowd and loads of information to guide you on your own n=1 keto WOE!

(Stephanie Sablich) #14

My goodness, thank you so much for the encouragement. I LOVE reading success (or struggle) stories from elders in this community, and I really appreciate you taking the time to bring a smile to my day. It means the world.

(Stephanie Sablich) #15

I am a major podcast addict and just subscribed today! Thanks for the tips- I feel the same about the “real human voice” but I never thought about how it could be applied to THIS aspect of life.

(Stephanie Sablich) #16

THAT is a beautiful technique. Thanks for sharing your story. I think part of my “I’ll log on for 20 minutes” was a time delay- waiting out the cravings, dealing with the emotions that accompany them, distracting if necessary. And thanks for the bacon :slight_smile:

(Stephanie Sablich) #17

Look at this list!! Gosh, I feel so supported already. It is kind of amazing. I’ve been an early gym-goer for a while, with spurts and fits of consistent activity. Part of my challenge is a move from a very active job to a sedentary student lifestyle, and I definitely think if I can refocus some of my stress towards activity and exercise, I’ll be much more satisfied with life generally.

You’re awesome. Thanks, so much.

(Stephanie Sablich) #18

Thank you so much for the welcome! I am so encouraged by these stories, and the solidarity in this journey.

(Stephanie Sablich) #19

That’s good to hear! I definitely need to try the pizza sometime… and the lasagna sounds interesting too :slight_smile:

#20

Welcome!
I second the fathead pizza recommendation. It’s really good, even my kids love it.