101 ways to stall... (a poem)

(Sarah Bruhn) #1

Eat too much protein,
Don’t eat enough Fat,
Eat too much carbbage,
Carb creep? f@$# that

Drink too much alcohol
don’t forget SALT!
are you eating too often?
Could it be leptins fault?

have you tried IF and EF and then
have you tried a fat fast? then try it again…

Could it be dairy?
is your insulin high?
Could it be nuts?
Are you so stressed you cry?

Are you sleeping soundly?
should you exercise?
Could it be your sweetner?
or an allergy not realised?

Or could it possibly
be a body finally
is happy as can be
at a warriors weight?

(icky) #2

Love it! :smile:

(Michelle) #3

[quote=“Sarah_Bruhn, post:1, topic:48358”]
warriors weight
[/quote] - my new goal! :muscle:t3:

#4

That’s great-- and soooo true!

(Karen) #5

LOVE LOVE LOVE :cupid::cupid::cupid: it!

(Ken) #6

As long as you don’t mean a Gladiator. Often they were called “The Barley Eaters”. You can guess why, natural extra protection.

Very nice poem.

(Aimee Moisa) #7

I heartily approve, and I even have a degree in English. (La-dee-da! My hubby calls it my Poetic License!) :slight_smile:

#8

:joy:

(Sarah Bruhn) #9

:joy: I spent a good 20 minutes on that!
honestly it was just going to be a list and it started sounding like a dr. suess book

(Sarah Bruhn) #10

feel free to add or change it, it’s a “work in progress” :joy:

(Linda) #11

I was working on a parody “50 ways to do your Keto” but I ran out of inspiration.

Step away from the cake, Jake
Lay off of the bread, Fred
Ramp up the fat, Matt…
Don’t forget salt, Walt

Contributions welcome!

(Aimee Moisa) #12

Now that you’ve started, you’re not going to be able to stop. :slight_smile:
Lemme know if you get stuck.

(Aimee Moisa) #13

@misterbutters

There must be 50 ways to heal your liver!

(Linda) #14

snort Not while I’m drinking something, ladylyssa.

(Sarah Bruhn) #15

Yes very specifically, not gladiators lol. Warrior weight in my version of “Phinny weight” I suppose, hope it catches on because Dr Phinny doesn’t like it being named after him.

(Ken) #16

You don’t have to starve, Marv.
Just put butter in your tea.

Have some more meat, Pete

You don’t want to be dead, Ed
You want to see your feet.

(Vivienne Clampitt) #17

Or magnesium, Liam!

(Ken) #18

Cut out the carbs, Barb

(Aimee Moisa) #19

Oh, you guys are awesome!

(Ken) #20

Don’t sweat a little stall, Paul.

Next we need a Haiku thread.