Stokies is cranky - feel free to ignore

(Carolyn aka stokies) #1

I know this is ridiculous but sometimes being the only one keto in the home can be just so damn infuriating. Being told by a spouse they are dieting and can’t eat what I eat because it isn’t ‘good’ or ‘healthy’ yet they witnessed me lose 115 @%@%&# pounds is… just… mind-boggling… for me today. I just can’t wrap my head around that.

I know I should be grateful for the fact this person has been relatively supportive and has not gotten in the way of my personal eating goals etc. But to hear them still fall prey to conventional thinking around dieting for themselves just makes me sad.

I guess I am just sad overall. This is the month I lost my mom, which also reminds me of my dad… Season of change and losses… just kinda overwhelms me today.

Thanks for listening. Gonna go outside in the fall weather to chase away some of these blues…

(hottie turned hag) #2

Curious, what is said when you point this (your weight loss) out?
That it was a fluke? Or that you lost the weight unhealthily? I’ve had folk state the latter :neutral_face:

(Carolyn aka stokies) #3

No they know it is because of how I eat and that I am much better for it now. They just don’t want to give up their carbs. To each their own. I can’t complain really - it just was a bad time for me to hear this mindset after all I went through to get healthy and they were there to witness it over all these years, ya know?

(hottie turned hag) #4

So not claiming it’s unhealthy for you, per se, but stating cannot eat themself because not good nor healthy? That’s a bit of twisted logic.

I go through frustrating convos with my youngest (age 20) daughter re: her diet but she admits it’s because she’s “too lazy” and “it’d be too inconvenient for how busy I am” not because she thinks it’s unhealthy.

I HAVE had folks state how unhealthy it is but I’m too apathetic to care; hearing it from a spouse though IS annoying. Tagging dear @Momof5 because she hears this daily from her adult daughters.

('Jackie P') #5

Bless you @stokiesgoneketo, I am so sorry for your loss. :pensive: Cranky is inevitable sometimes!
As regards your spouse, mmm … try and effect a natural sounding laugh and joyfully sing “show me the science darling”!

(Hyperbole- best thing in the universe!) #6

pppfffththppfff. Is all I have to say to that.

(Failed) #7

Those carber excuses sound like the excuses alcoholics use…

(Susan) #8

I can totally relate to this, Carolyn. My hubby should be on Keto, he has Diverticulitis, Bipolar, Hydrocephalus and Parkinsons -he is 55 and over weight and not well. He is in pain all the time, and is still working full time; but I know it will just be a matter of time before he will be going on Disability. It is verrrrry frustrating. He is the same as your partner; supportive of me doing Keto, but says he cannot do it, etc.

My kids at home still are my 3 daughters that are 25 (moving out in the near future as she just bought her first house with her bf and they are renovating it a bit first -then will continue after living in it), and the other two are 21 and almost 19, and my grand daughter that is 3 (she is the most Keto of that bunch, but not actually). My kids tell me all the time that I am going to die of a heart attack or a stroke from being Keto…it is very annoying to say the least.

I am so sorry for the loss of your parents; I lost my dad in November, 2003, and I think about him a lot. My mom is 91 with alzheimers and due to a complicated situation with my brother taking over her life and finances after my dad died, it is like I have already lost her as well.

I love this response, this is classic and lovely!!!

You are an amazing woman, Carolyn, and a truly inspiring example to myself (who has lost 51 pounds but still has 120’s to lose). The fact that you have lost 115 is such an encouragement to me!! Everyone here thinks you a really brilliant woman and appreciates you and has been so thrilled for you in all of your successes!!

Your spouse should see all this as well, and be looking at you as an amazing Keto example and should want to follow in your pathway. I will keep my fingers crossed that one day that this will happen in your household (as I do for mine as well!). I am sorry that your partner is not clicking in that you have done such a remarkable job on improving your life with Keto and that Keto is very very sustainable and awesome. I hope that one day that will change!

(squirrel-kissing paper tamer) #9

Aww, I hope you feel better soon. Speaking from experience, sometimes all you can do is ride it out. But going outside and watching birds, something as simple as getting out of the room I’m being sad in, can help so I’m glad you’re getting out. Are you still cycling as much, does it help? If all else fails, I sleep it off. Probably not the healthiest coping mechanism, but sometimes it’s what works. Hey, just think, Halloween is right around the corner. I can always get a little excited about that!

(Troy) #10

I can understand
When going through a loss of a loved one, emotions, grieving, and changing your WOE to be healthy
Results a plenty :smile:

The last thing you want to hear or be reminded of from the peanut gallery " that’s not healthy eating ":rage:

As I’m replying to this, I’m enjoying some Nathan’s hot dogs and pack of pepperoni slices …avoiding lol my local peanut gallery
Aka " that’s too much processed junk " :rofl:

For me, I take one day at a time
Easier said than done sometimes
Tomorrow, if you have the motivation, saddle up, and enjoy a Fall season cycle ride🙂

Good Luck

#11

I have the same situation, though I haven’t lost 115 pounds! But over the years, my husband has seen me improve my health completely AND lose weight and keep it off with the way I eat.

It’s the same for him. He has been supportive, as you say. But he’s not ready yet to give up his carbs.

It’s just sad to not have them in the boat with you. I wish my husband would take more of his health in his hands. So you are not ridiculous. Not to me.

And I’m sorry for your losses of your mom and your dad. Fall is a time that feels like change for me too. Sometimes that is sad and sometimes happy.

I hope you found some cool Fall leaves to look at or something (not sure where you live–my son lives in Texas, and they aren’t anywhere near ‘cool’ weather yet). Hang in there.

(Carolyn aka stokies) #12

Right? He does even acknowledge that at least… so there’s hope lol

(Carolyn aka stokies) #13

You are always so kind… thank you for your on-going support :heavy_heart_exclamation:

We will always have our keto tribe, if nothing else, right?

I hope things shift for you too!

(Carolyn aka stokies) #14

Halloween is my most loved holiday :smile: So definitely something to look forward to - and yes, love autumn. I live in New England, and it’s finally full on fall :heart:

(Carolyn aka stokies) #15

Got to throw in 30 miles today so that was a HUGE help for the mental shift! Love the avoidance of the peanut gallery too - so thank you for the giggle!

(Carolyn aka stokies) #16

Welcome to the keto krew Melanie!

Glad to know I am not crazy (about this at least hahaha)

New Englander here, so autumn is kicking in… and enjoying that at least - so thank you for the reminder!

#17

Thank you, Stokies.

Lol. I know, right? We’re all a little crazy about something.

Nice! You probably have great leaves right now.

:slight_smile: Take good care. Keep keto’ing!

Melanie

#18

Finding our way through life is an individual journey, no one can walk another’s path. Humans tend to come to their revelations via process and often pain, that was the way to my epiphany. We want to spare others but can only be a light bearer for those who have the eyes to see.
Take care of yourself, your body, your temple, and in doing so your affect will ripple out to the greater good.
Well done!

(Kirk Wolak) #19

Yes, you already said… They can’t do it…
I know many people in this camp. Neighbors who want the results but not put in the effort. It doesn’t work that way. It’s simple enough… But not if you are not going to change.

One neighbor said “It’s too bad the weight comes back so fast… Otherwise I would use Keto to lose 20lbs, since it is easy, and then slowly put it back on, then do keto…”

I asked… Why not just stay Keto? (Oh, I could never do that, you have to give up all the “good” stuff).
You mean, the “good” stuff that makes you gain weight, increases your risk of T2D, obesity, saps you of your energy, and triggers you to eat when you are not hungry.

Neighbor: Yeah! That stuff! (like “That Stuff” had a positive in there… Of course, it is SIMPLY their addiction speaking!)

(David Hagy) #20

Keep calm and keto on!
I’m in the same boat. Only one keto, lost 30+ lbs. gained energy, clarity, flexibility.
Where’s the downside?
I occasionally eat regular desserts and recently went on a vacation for two weeks, put on 9 lbs but quickly lost it after a week of returning to lo-carb.
KCKO
David