You do know what happened vv this happened.
That’s nothing to be ashamed about. If there is ever a parent who says they don’t get stressed and frustrated, they are either lying, a none resident parent or they just don’t care about the kids!
Tell me about it!
My 2 are now 10 and 8. They have just had 2 weeks off school for Easter. They go back tomorrow. I have a course tomorrow but Tuesday I intend to enjoy the peace and quiet and watch what I want on TV all day!
Don’t get me wrong, I love them and heaven help anyone who does them wrong, but by God, sometimes I just want them to go away, even if only for 10 mins. It doesn’t help that the ‘me’ things usually stop over the holidays too, so no respite there. Luckily I have a friend who has them for me so I can do my art therapy on Fridays and over the longer school holidays that is such a welcome break from them.
I’m glad your hubby helps with children, maybe he’d be willing to take them both out, when you get the double buggy, and for now, maybe he could have both of them while you go out for a walk/have a coffee with friends/do a yoga class/ whatever makes you feel good, just so you can relax and recharge a little.
Remember this ^^ that is all anyone can expect. We each do the best we can at any given moment.
You have to look after you, or you can’t look after your babies.
You are doing a good job, take a deep breath, remind yourself of that, then KCKO
I’m adding to the virtual hugs being sent your way 
so much!!