Cheating by any other name

(Candra ) #1

I see a lot of posts where people say “I haven’t cheated but I am not losing … or I am gaining!” Well … I have decided that there is “cheating” and then there is “cheating.”

The last few weeks I have noticed that I am starving in the morning and a lot more hungry during the day. I have been gaining and losing the same 2 pounds and I am starting to feel less energetic and depressed. I HAVE NOT CHEATED! (Meaning, I have not gone over my carbs or eaten any non-keto food) So what gives?

Let me tell you what gives … I have gotten lazy! I stopped tracking! I have been eating whenever I want to! I have not been to the gym! I have been using sweetener whenever I want! I stopped measuring!

So even though I have not “cheated” in the true sense of the word … I have cheated myself!

After 4 months of being on the WOL and losing 28 pounds I was getting tired of being so diligent. I was tired of measuring and tracking. I figured “I have this down!”

Because of how I have been feeling I knew that I wasn’t in ketosis any longer. I ordered some urine strips and finally ordered 10 blood ketone strips yesterday (I am unemployed and can’t afford them so have been putting it off) and received them this morning (I love living near an Amazon Warehouse) … as I expected I am at 0.4 and showing 0 on urine strips.

Today has been hard … I have been hungry all day and feel like if I don’t eat I will go crazy! I am not craving sweets which is a blessing. So here I am having to take a cold, hard, “come to Jesus meeting” with myself. I realize that as someone who is addicted to food (not just sugar) and someone who has trouble with binge eating that I may have to always be diligent. I had to do a lot of self talk today about what my goals and dreams are and how to get there … even if it’s hard.

For some people this WOL seems easy but for me it has been hard and sometimes exhausting. It is more mental for me than physical. I feel like I have fought tooth and nail for the the 29 pounds I have lost. I have another 112 pounds to goal and that seems very daunting to me and so unattainable. I feel like all I think about is keto! Are my macros correct? Should I be fasting? Are my macros correct? Should I cut out dairy? Are my macros correct? Should I cut out this? or that? Are my macros correct? I swear I drive myself crazy!

So there was a reason for my “laziness” … I was tired mentally! But I have to find a way to make this work for me. I WILL make this work for me! I have to get back up on the horse and stay diligent.

I really feel that the WOL is the right choice for me and I am happy that I have found this forum (3 days ago or so)!

(Michael Wallace Ellwood) #2

I know from bitter experience that it’s easy to take your eye off the ball.

That’s why, this time around, I am monitoring and recording religiously (well, more or less…).

(It’s also easy to kid oneself that one isn’t gaining - I speak for myself and don’t suggest that’s what you or anyone else does).

#3

First of all great work on losing 29 pounds! I feel like when I get to the “I got this” phase is always when everything goes to hell. If tracking works for you then get back to it, but don’t drive yourself bonkers. I, too, am obsessed with this WOL even after a year. I told my 10 yr old daughter I wanted the family to watch a movie together tonight (“Fed up”), before I even said the title, she asked “Is it about ketones Mom?” You can do this…KCKO!

(Candra ) #4

LOL! Thank you! This WOE is very consuming! I have good news though … I tracked everything yesterday and stayed in my macros and didn’t have any sweetener or berries. I knew I had gone back into ketosis during the night because I woke up itching (Just keto rash unfortunately) and this morning my ketone level was .7 and after my BPC I got busy and didn’t get a chance to eat until 4 pm so got some fasting in. Before I ate I took my ketones and was at 1.2. So I will continue to be more diligent!

#5

Bravo catching yourself in this situation and making the shift.

May I suggest something? I don’t think you are lazy. I think you are learning new way of making decisions and getting better at listening to your body. I think you deserve to be congratulated for discovering how to be more “mindful”. You were not lazy…not at all…you are learning the art of mindfulness. Kudos to you for that!

(8 year Ketogenic Veteran) #6

Yeah. What @Fiorella says.

You didn’t gain it overnight, PLUS, your body needs time to metabolically unfuck itself.

I didn’t lose at all at first, but I lost my depression right away. I was also shifting fat to muscle. The scale will not move when you are doing that.

Cut yourself some slack. Yes, cool it on sweeteners, I use them, but not in excess. And count 20 net carbs in your head. The rest don’t stress. Figure out what a moderate amount of protein is for you (for me it’s a 10 oz steak or 2 chicken thighs etc) and eat fat whenever you want.
Remember, the ketogenic diet is not about calories, it’s about hormones. Many things will affect weight loss, even lack of sleep. Too much stress too. You don’t have to exercise to lose weight. At all. But it might make you feel better physically overall.

Relax. This is not a “quick weight loss diet”.
This may help:

(Candra ) #7

Thank you @Fiorella! I appreciate your thoughtful reply and wisdom! You made my heart happy! I am learning more and more to be gracious and kind to myself!

(Candra ) #8

Thank you @Brenda! One of the reasons I have always failed at diets is because I “think” am a rule follower and I “think” I feel more in control when things are spelled out and are mostly black and white. But in reality I get bored and anxious with rules. I can’t even follow a normal recipe most times without going outside the box and doing my own thing with the recipe LOL! Most dieting rules are not always easy to follow and I then feel like a failure. But I also am not a very disciplined person so can easily go rogue if there aren’t any rules (I know, I am a complex mess sometimes!) So … when I came across the keto diet, even though I knew in my heart (after much research … I am a natural born researcher!) that it was the right thing for me it was hard for me because, just as you said, there are no rules. I nearly drove myself bonkers with the whole macro thing and to tell the truth I still haven’t quite figured it out. I also at first would freak out when I didn’t lose (I lost only 0.4 pound the whole month of March.) I, as a very intelligent person, and having gotten a Bachelor’s degree in nursing, I understand the science more than most and understand that weight fluctuates, etc. but it was still hard to not doubt myself. Since there are no rules there was no way for me to know if I was doing things correctly. I have relaxed in that aspect somewhat and as I said, I took a little break (not from keto, just the obsessing) so that I could work out my anxiety over it all. It did help to stop obsessing for a while but I went a tad over the line and got myself out of ketosis. So now I know that I can be less ridged but still need to be mindful (thanks @Fiorella!) of what I am putting in my mouth and when. I have felt so much better the last two days and finally got to my first goal of losing 30 pounds and hitting the 250 pound mark! I have a long way to go but I haven’t seen 250 pounds in many years so I am happy to see it and wave goodbye to it on my way to my next goal of 225!

#9

^^^THIS!!!

Don’t get caught up in being a macro nazi, thats the beginning of the end. Next your be over on /r/keto reciting the laws of thermodynamics to a bunch of people that pray to nutritional labels. It takes all the great things of keto and merges them with the hell of being a calorie counter. Also remember the pee strips crap out on you (in most cases) once your fat adapted so don’t take them too serious. Congrats on your results, you’ll hit your goal. Sometimes you just go through bad spots. I’ve been eating this way more or less since 2004-2005 and I can’t count how many 5,6,7,8,9.10 week stalls I’ve gone through. They pass.

(8 year Ketogenic Veteran) #10

I love you, you rebel.

Agreed you mutineer you. You are my new bestie

Stop. I’ll need to propose soon

Ditto.

I hear your frustration. It takes time to shift our habits and thinking. You’re doing great. The most important thing is to just keep going. It gets better. I am STILL having improvement after THREE YEARS!!

(Candra ) #11

Thank you @lfod14! [quote=“lfod14, post:9, topic:11240”]
It takes all the great things of keto and merges them with the hell of being a calorie counter.
[/quote]

LOL! Yes!

Part of my problem was that I was on several FB groups where the keto Nazi’s live and there were things I wanted to ask or say or clarify but I knew if I did their heads would spin around!! So I am so happy that I found this forum! It is like keto Nirvana! I think I can be more of a “keto hippy” here? And since @Brenda and I are practically soul sisters (or are we practically engaged?) I think I will stay for a while!

#12

Exactly. Be kind to yourself. You deserve it.

I hope you keep us informed on how your journey is going. You got this!

#13

It’s on Netflix. Worth the watch?

#14

Yes! Really disheartening look at the childhood obesity epidemic. So sad that kids and their parents are trying to eat a “healthy diet” to lose weight and it’s straight up carbage. It is a crime that these kids/parents are failing when they are trying their best to get healthy, but unsuccessful because they are following shit advice of the “experts”.

#15

I started watching it last night, and I was getting so mad at those so-called experts. Those poor kiddos. I hope to finish it soon.

#16

Agreed! I was vascillating between anger and nearly crying. Keto is the answer to all their struggles.