You know you’re a ketoer when you pop into the work kitchenette and grab a quick salt fix before heading into your next shift…
You are in the grocery store and you see just egg whites in containers in the dairy section and wonder where are all those good egg yolks? … Where can I buy those?
When you are supporting a training course and your only thought to the organizer’s sad faced announcement that unfortunately there is no lavish dinner organized for tonight (only last night and tomorrow night when you are not there) is “YES!!! I don’t have to eat!!!”
When you realise you’re pretty skint already but look at as a chance to do EF’s each week until payday.
When u stayti make your own bone broth and save skins from chicken thighs to krispbthen later in an oven
You know you’re a ketoer when you need to buy some new clothes but then realise that in a month’s time they’re going to be too big for you.
When your company thinks it’s doing something nice and you just see poison. It was a peanut/cracker mix, m&ms, Chex mix, trail mix and Halloween candy.
'Spoon yourselves out some bowls of candy," eh?
“I’ve never had to spoon candy out of blocked arteries before” future Joel Kahn BS, probably on Joe Rogan’s podcast
You know you’re keto when your neighbor tells you she has 90 eggs (her sister-in-law has chickens and we buy her eggs), asks how many we’d like and I say “all of them, see you next week”
You know you’re a ketoer when you realise that you should probably put away those two empty fruit bowls that have been sitting on your kitchen bench for a month.
Just put eggs in them.
We keep our eggs in the fridge.
That’s where our avocados now live.
You know you’re a ketoer when…
-you have to fight the urge to smack the doughnut out of your mother’s hand.
-you want to know how many carbs are in your dog’s kibble.
-people stare at you when you salt your food.
You guys, I had a DREAM I was explaining Keto to strangers at a buffet. The mom in my dream was telling her kid to go easy on the butter on some carby thing he was putting together and I’m like “ACTUALLY…” Good grief! I’m an insufferable Keto cult member even in my sleep!
I hope my first keto dream is a good one. I don’t want to wake up in a cold sweat, having dreamt of eating a whole bag of Cheetohs… then realizing, I have Cheetoh fingers.
When you are fasting and the can of cat food smells good and triggers hunger pains…
I had a dream (nightmare) the other night that I absent-mindedly picked up a couple of chocolate biscuits and started eating them. I was halfway through chewing the first mouthful when I remembered with shock that it was a big no-no, so I spat it out.