Keto Complaint Department

(Brenda Zorn) #1157


(Bev Anne Moynham) #1158

My biggest problem is not feeling guilty about my weight now that I know it wasn’t my fault. But then, now I can blame it on the government and the food pyramid – it’s always nice to have someone else to blame for stuff.


My bacon pile don’t fit in my boxes any more. I will have to buy bigger boxes now.
Also no one told me about having to decide which dip to dip in first.
Bacon dipped in cream sounds odd! but it is seriously lush. My keto life is sooooooo hard.

Need advice for slipping (carb wise) the last few days. 3 weeks in

Cor blimey @The_Keto_Cockney. You don’ half have a decent spread there 'n all.


OH! I’m seriously pissed, it took 3 minuets for the Kerrygold to melt in my coffee this morning.
What is this world coming to. Butter just don’t melt like it used to, in the good ye olde Eastend days it would melt in seconds. Back then all butter was made by the Queen herself by hand.

(Jacquelyn Graham) #1162

Pulled out some pants size 8 I hadn’t worn in a while and they still fit. No excuses to buy new clothes anymore since my weight doesn’t fluctuate wildly since I’ve been Keto for nearly three years. Perhaps I’ll have an accidental bleach spill somewhere in my future. :wink:


Not very Eco sweetheart . I’d go with the zips and buttons they don’t make a mess but do.:innocent:


Had a frustrating appointment with the doc today so I lashed out in rebellion and made this.

Warm salad with, wilted spinach, bacon, chicken, Gorgonzola, shallot, bell pepper, lettuce, tomato, garlic stuffed green olives, dressed in my very own vinaigrette Warmed in a pan of smoked garlic, butter, pork fat, duck fat.
Now that’s revenge.

(TJ Borden) #1165

I have to start planning for retirement…

Okay, I know I can be a smart ass, and a significant amount of what I say isn’t meant to be taken seriously, but this is sincere.

Having spent so many years as large as I was, I never assumed I’d make it past 60ish, so I just got a decent life insurance policy when I was young enough they didn’t ask any health questions, and figured between that and my wife’s retirement, she’d be taken care of.

I also used to tease her that she’d have plenty of time after I’m gone to hire a pool boy and “enjoy” he older years.

It occurred to me the other day, that 60 isnt my expiration date anymore and she and I might be retiring TOGETHER… sadly for her, that means no pool boy.

(Darren Conway) #1166

Oh, TJ, about six months in I could already tell, getting old with Lisa is going to be great!
Now if I can just get the kids to move out. :wink:

(Mike Glasbrener) #1167

Why can’t she have a pool boy?:innocent:


You beat me to it :grin:

(Mic Cullen) #1169

What if she’s REALLY fixated on that idea by now, eh?

(TJ Borden) #1170

I am actually a bit concerned about that :joy:

(Kirk) #1171

As Forrest Gump said, one less thing to worry about, right?

(Charlie Kathopoulis) #1172

TJ slap some budgy smugglers on, some coconut oil SP +4 and be her pool boy :stuck_out_tongue:

(Mike Glasbrener) #1173

That was the point. If she was fixated and he disallowed her right to a pool boy perhaps bay’s hope for a long life might not come to fruition…

(LeeAnn Brooks) #1174

You just need to become her pool boy.
Problem solved.

(Darren Conway) #1175

Keto Complaint Department: Keto made me a pool boy.

I used to be a intellectual man, now I’m just an objectified play thing. :frowning_face:

(Eric) #1176

I’m always going to the store for :bacon: and :fried_egg:

But Bacon is life!